Going to be a good weekend......
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Sunrise this morning....My friend over the mountain has to wait a half hour,
before the Sun gets to him......
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Wow....What a big Cat.......
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Ole, ole, Lady do.....Wish I could Yodel!
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I told ya not to get too close!
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I don't know......I guess you could drag your foot?
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You better run Bubba!
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Hauling off trash....??
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Oh My...! They should not stand together!
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What a party..Huh??
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Guess who's in trouble now... She needs to pop him in the head....
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♥♥♥
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~~ Boss: (to employee) - Experts say humor on the job relieves
tension in this time of down-sizing,....... Knock, Knock.
Employee: Who's there?
Boss: Not you anymore.
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~~ for the politicians.. A shut mouth gathers no foot.
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~~ So Moses was talking with God, and Moses said, "Wait a minute.
Let me get this straight.....
They get to keep the oil, and we cut off the tip of our what?"
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~~ As Bill and Jack headed off for their weekly round of golf,
Bill suggested: "To make the game more interesting,
why don't we have $10 on the lowest score for the day?"
Jack agreed, and they enjoyed a really close game.
With one hole to play, Bill led by a single stroke, but then on the
eighteenth he cut his ball into the rough.
"Help me find my ball," he called to Jack.
"You search over there, I'll look around here"
After five minutes of fruitless searching, Bill, knowing that he was
facing a disastrous penalty for a lost ball,
sneakily pulled a ball from his pocket, droped it on the ground and
called out triumphantly: "Hey, I've found my ball."
Jack looked across at him in disgust.
"After all the years we've been friends," he said,
"how could you cheat on me at golf for a measly few bucks?"
"What do you mean, cheat?" protested Bill.
"I found my ball sitting right there!"
"And a liar too!" exclaimed Jack in disbelief.
"What makes you think I'm lying?" yelled Bill.
"Because," said Jack, "I've been standing on your ball for the last
five minutes!"
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~~ Crime doesn't pay...Does that mean my job is a crime?
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~~ One read through this man's résumé and it was no wonder he was
looking for a new line of work: Under "Previous Job," he'd written,
"Stalker at Walmart."
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~~ After finishing his meal, my grandfather, a retired Marine captain,
asked the waitress for the 15 percent discount the restaurant offered
veterans.
"Do you need to see my military ID?" he asked.
"That's all right," she said...."I know you were in the military.
I can tell by your T-shirt."
Grandpa's shirt read "Welcome to Gettysburg National Military Park."
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~~ Do you think that Moses led the Israelites through the desert for
forty years because God was testing him,
or because he wanted them to really appreciate the promised land when
they finally got there,
or was it because Moses refused to ask anybody for directions?"
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~~ The Lady asked her fiance's friend about his eating habit,
to which he replied "he's a very light eater.'
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Months after the wedding she calls the friend and says
"I thought you said he was a light eater?"
The friend replied "He is.
He begins eating as soon as it is light and continues as long as there
is a light in the refrigerator."
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~~ TEACHER: "Willie, how do you define ignorance?"
WILLIE: "It's when you don't know something and somebody finds out."
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Todays Thought; I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now, I don't know what to feed it.
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What kind of CAT is that....Looks like someone crossed a tiger with a TABBY....
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