Well, we didn't get any rain or snow, I guess it went north
of us.... But it's cold and windy today....
☺
A new morning.....
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Oh, He's all tuckered out.....
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Another one tired... I guess they been playing too long.
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Oh, My..she's cute......
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A weird looking cat....big eyes.....
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Oh, my....lovers?
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I thought my school was tough...but we didn't carry guns.....
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These were our Cheer Leaders.....
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Oh, My......
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♥♥♥
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~~ I told my therapist I think I suffer from low self esteem, and she
said that I shouldn't worry because that is a very common feeling
among losers.
☺
~~ Her arms laden with Christmas gifts, Mrs. Douglas remembered she
had forgotten to mail a card to her childhood friend Faye.
Buying a card and dashing into the post office, she bought a first-class
stamp.
"Excuse me, she said, her arms aching.
"but must I put the stamp on myself?"
"No ma'am," deadpanned the clerk, "it goes on the envelope."
☺
~~ I'd just come home from my sixth medical appointment of the
week with one more to go, so I was in a lousy mood when my daughter
called.
After I recited my woes, my daughter said,
"Well, seven doctors is better than one coroner."
☺
~~ While teaching a Grade 9 English class, I attempted to build the
students' vocabularies by having them use the new words we had
collected from a novel.
On one occasion they were instructed to write a sentence using the
verb "emerge."
One student's answer:
"Grandpa fell down last night and we had to take him to emerge."
☺
~~ Mother to daughter in local department store:
"If it has anybody's name on it, it's too expensive."
☺
~~ Working on my master's degree, I was enduring a long night of
studying in my unfinished basement.
My four-year-old daughter, Liz peered down at me from the top of the
stairs and asked me what I was doing.
I told her that I needed some time alone to finish a bit of work and that
I would come upstairs shortly to play.
Noticing one of my books, she asked me what I was reading.
"A book on finance," I told her.
She looked very confused, then came down the stairs and looked in,
under and around the book.
"Daddy, finance?" she questioned.
"I don't see any fine ants!"
☺
~~ On a recent appointment with my therapist, I told him I had
something very interesting to tell him.
When I was done, I woke him up, and paid him.
I like the way he let's me get things off my chest without interupting me.
☺
~~ I had been complaining for months about my noisy old upright
vacuum cleaner.
When it finally bit the dust, I happily ran out and bought the
snappy-looking red canister vacuum that I'd had my eye on for some
time.
I really wasn't aware of how much I bragged about the new addition
to my cleaning arsenal until the day my husband, George,
walked in just as I came around the corner with my new vacuum in tow.
"Wow, honey!" he said.
"When did you teach it to follow you like that?"
☺
~~ The irate diner raised his hand to catch the attention of a passing
waiter.
"Excuse me," said the man, "but how long have you been working here?"
"About a year," replied the waiter.
"In that case," continued the diner,
"it couldn't have been you that took my order."
☺
~~ "Yes, mother, I've had a hard day.
Gladys has been most difficult - I know I ought to be more firm,
but it is hard.
Well, you know how she is.
Yes, I remember you warned me.
I remember you told me that she was a vile creature who would
make my life miserable and you begged me not to marry her.
You were perfectly right.
You want to speak with her? All right."
He looks up from the telephone and calls to his wife in the next room,
"Gladys, your mother wants to talk to you!"
☺
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Todays Thought: Everyone thinks of changing the world but no one thinks of changing
himself.
(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)?(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)(ºOº)
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