My friend "Flex Man" came for a visit...
Had a good time getting the news and seeing how he's doing...
A nice Man.....
.
This mornings Sunrise......
.
Yep....good Morning.....
.
Oh, My....You an't right......
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Yeh,...Bite that ear......
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Super Cat will save you.....
.
We don't believe you......
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What kind of deal this is?? looks pretty dumb.......
.
Gotta keep the tooter warm....or it won't toot......
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Well, if I can find my way out, I'll be on my way....
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♥♥♥
~~ After hearing a church sermon about lies and deceit,
a man wrote to the IRS:" I have been unable to sleep,
knowing that I have cheated on my income tax.
I understand my taxable income and have enclosed a cheque
for $900.
If I still can't sleep, I will send the rest."
.
~~ After years of controversy the university football coach
finally had to agree that the school was placing too much
emphasis on sports and too little on education:
Though every player on the team had a letter,
only three of them knew which one it was.
.
~~ The enlisted men were having a beer at a café off post.
When the topic got off girls, they started to talk about soldiering.
Most of them were bitter about being drafted.
One said, "Sure, you know who didn't have to get into uniform,
the sons of the big shots!.... They used pull!"
From the next table, a voice said, "Men, you have it all wrong,
I've been in two months and I can tell you that all kinds of men
get taken into the army.
My dad's a senator and I'm here!"
The other soldiers nodded and said, "Well, maybe you're right,
Major Brown!"
.
~~ A father is asked by his friend, "Has your son decided what
he wants to be when he grows up?"
"Yes, he wants to be a garbage collector," he replies.
To this his friend responds, "Strange ambition to have for a
career."
"Well, he thinks that garbage collectors only work on Tuesdays!"
.
~~ Q: Why did the chicken cross the playground?
A: To get to the other slide.
.
~~ The Santa Claus at the shopping mall was very surprised
when a Emily, young lady aged about 20 years old walked up
and sat on his lap.
Now, we all know that Santa doesn't usually take requests from
adults, but she smiled very nicely at him, so he asked her,
"What do you want for Christmas?"
"Something for my mother, please," replied Emily sweetly.
"Something for your mother?
Well, that's very loving and thoughtful of you," smiled Santa.
"What do would you like me to bring her?"
Without turning a hair Emily answered quickly, "A son-in-law."
.
~~ the teacher asked....
"What were you before you came to school, boys and girls?" ,
hoping that someone would say "babies."
She was disappointed when all the children cried out, "Happy!"
.
~~ A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices
a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across
the street.
However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for
him to reach.
After watching the boy's efforts for some time, the priest moves
closer to the boy's position.
He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little
fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder leans over and gives the doorbell a sold ring.
Crouching down to the child's level, the priest smiles benevolently
and asks, "And now what, my little man?"
To which the boy replies, "Now we run!"
.
~~ Two boys of six were discussing fibbing.
One said, "A fib is just a story and a story is a lie."
"It is not."
"It is too. My father told me, and he's a teacher."
"My father is a real-estate salesman.
He knows more about lying than your father!"
.
~~ A rabbi and a minister were at the neighborhood picnic.
As they rode in one of the boats on the lake, the rabbi stood up,
stepped out of the boat, and walked over the water to the
nearest stretch of land.
Astonished, the minister decided to see if he could duplicate this
miraculous feat.
He stepped out of the boat and sank.
But he managed to swim ashore.
As he started to dry himself off, the rabbi walked over and said,
"If you're a nice guy, next time I'll show you where the rocks are!"
.
.
Todays thought: If you go out looking for friends, you will find them very scarce.
If you go out looking to be a friend, you will find them everywhere.
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