Ready for Christmas...? Gonna be bad weather...
but we are ready....
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I hope Everyone has a great Christmas, and a happy Holiday..
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Oh, No...there goes my nose....help!
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What a gift....
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Watch him,..SANTA!!...
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A redneck Reindeer.....??
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You will think different when he grabs you.....Squirrels can be mean...
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Santa's not gonna like this......
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This is why I like "ENO"...
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"Eno's" the MAN/....
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Well, I guess I will leave after this.....
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.♥♥♥
~~ On Christmas Eve, Gus thought it would be nice to buy his
Lady friend a little gift for the next day.
Always short of money, he thought long and hard about what
that present might be' Unable to decide,
Gus entered Target and in the cosmetics section he asked
the girl, 'How about some perfume?'
She showed him a bottle costing $150.00
'Too expensive,' muttered Gus.
The young lady returned with a smaller bottle for $75.00
'Oh dear,' Gus groused, 'still far too much.'
Growing rather annoyed at Gus's meanness,
the sales girl brought out a tiny $20 bottle and offered it to him.
Gus became really agitated, 'What I mean', he whined,
'is I'd like to see something really cheap.'
So the sales girl handed him a mirror.
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~~ Bobbie was going to the Christmas office party but needed
a new party dress.
In the clothing store she asked,
'May I try on that dress in the window, please?'
'Certainly not, madam,' responded the salesgirl,
'You'll have to use the fitting room like everyone else.'
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~~ What do you call a snowman on rollerblades?
A snowmobile.
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~~ What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Snowflakes.
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~~ What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Frostbite.
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~~ How do you explain ice to a child?
Skid stuff!
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~~ Just before Xmas, an honest politician,
a generous lawyer and Santa Claus all got into the elevator at
the Ritz Hotel in R-ville.
As the elevator travelled from the 5th floor down to the ground
level, one-by-one they noticed a $50 note lying on the elevator's
floor.
Which one picked up the $50 note, and handed it in at reception?
Santa of course, the other two don't actually exist!
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~~ 'I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with
a note on it saying, toys not included.'
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~~ Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
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~~ Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and
adults pay for it.
Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and
their kids pay for it.
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~~ Blonde goes into a pet shop to buy a goldfish.
The store owner says 'do you want an aquarium'.
The blonde says, 'I don't care what star sign it is'.
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~~ You know how people do the wave at stadiums..
What do you call it when midgets do it?
A ripple.
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~~ Richard Milhouse Nixon was the first United States President
whose name contains all the letters from the word "criminal."
The second? William Jefferson Clinton.
.
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Todays Thought: 'Peace on earth will come to stay, when we live Christmas every day.'
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