Down Hummingbird Lane

Good Morning, Friends....I'm not eating today...getting ready for tomorrow.
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She's glad she's not a Turkey.....

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Oh My! Your breath stinks...Bubba.

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My what big teeth you have gramma!!

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WHOOOOOO......Sorry I asked....

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Yawn....

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Look! Out! He'll crap on you !!

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Lovey, Dovey....Just wait....they'll rip you face off.....

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More Bad eggs.........

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What can you say??

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Can you give me a tow...I need to leave here...

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♥♥♥

~~ Due to his hectic schedule, I had seen little of the medical

student who had moved next door to me two years earlier.
I learned that he had graduated, and one day when I spotted
him in his driveway, I went over and congratulated him.
"Well," I said, "Now if I break my arm, you'll be able to fix it."
"Gus," he replied, "I've been able to fix your arm for some time.
The important thing is that now I can bill for it."

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~~ Live a good, honorable life.
Then when you get older and think back,
you'll enjoy it a second time.

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~~ Name-calling and profanity are not tolerated at our
junior high school.
So I was concerned when a student complained that another
student had called him the e word.
"E word?" I asked.
I couldn't think of even one.
"What e word did he call you?"
He lowered his voice and muttered, "Idiot."

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~~ The aptly named entertainer Harry Richman was occasionally
known to tip a waiter fifty dollars simply for being handed the menu.
Richman once asked a head waiter, "What's the biggest tip you've
ever received?"
"A hundred dollars" The waiter replied.
Richman gave the man two hundred dollars.
"Now tell me," Richman asked, "who gave you the hundred?"
"You did, Mr Richman." the waiter replied.

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~~ When my son was in third grade, he was having difficulty
with his math homework.
I asked my son if he needed help.
“Thanks anyway, Mom, but you can't help me,” he replied.
“You only teach second grade.”

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~~ A printer consists of 3 main parts:
1. The case
2. The jammed paper tray
3. The blinking red light.

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~~~ Frequently complimented on what a pretty girl she was,
my five- year-old daughter, had become fairly used to relatives
and friends' comments.
One evening my friend Eleanor came to visit just as Maria
was being tucked into bed, so she came to say good night.
“My!” Eleanor said, “you have really long eyelashes!”
“Yes, Eleanor,” said Maria.
“They should be long.
I've been growing them for five years,” she paused,
“and I never cut them once.”

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~~ When your children are teenagers, it's important to have
a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.

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~~ A painter, who lived in Great Britain,
Interrupted two girls with their knittin'
He said, with a sigh,
"That park bench--well I
Just painted it, right where you're sittin.'"

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~~ A lifeguard and a beautiful young lady were going at it hot
and heavy on the beach.
A passerby said to the lifeguard, "You're supposed to give
mouth-to-mouth rescuscitation."
The lifeguard said, "Well, that's how this started out!"

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~~ I was visiting a friend who could not find her cordless phone.
After several minutes of searching, her young daughter said,
“You know what they should invent?
A phone that stays connected to its base so it never gets lost.”
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Todays Thought:  "Opportunity is missed by most people: Because it is dressed

in overalls and looks like work." --Thomas Edison....