Good Morning.....Friends......Little chilly this morning.......
But, you know, it feels good for a change...
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Picnic...on Montalto Mt. overlooking C-ville..... nice view....
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Same place........different view.....
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Carol sent me this picture...I thought it was great......
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Yah,....you gotta watch em........
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Hey...I don't kmow about this guy.... some things not right....
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Mowing the grass, are you?.....
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See...I love ENO.........
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I think he the greatest...... ENO, the man.....
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♥♥♥
~~ "I didn't come here to be insulted."
"Oh? Where do you usually go?"
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~~ I put some turnips, my eleven-year-old son's least-favorite
vegetable, on his dinner plate and instructed him to eat everything.
He cleaned his plate, except for the turnip.
I pointed out to him that if he'd eaten it earlier, he wouldn't have
been left with its taste in his mouth at the end of the meal.
Thoughtfully, he replied, "I guess I was just trying to delay the
inedible."
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~~~ "I just came from the beauty parlor."
"What's the matter--weren't they open?"
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~~~ My friend read her son's horoscope and thought it quite
appropriate.
"You've spent the last few weeks looking for escape," it said.
"But now it's time to get on with your life."
She had just given birth to him that morning.
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~~ My dad's an honest guy.
So during a safety workshop, when asked what the
speed limit was in the factory's parking lot,
he gave an honest answer:
"It depends on how late you are."
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~~~ One day when appendectomy operations were just becoming
standard medical practice in the late nineteenth century,
German pathologist and reformist politician Rudolph Virchow was
asked whether it was true that a human could survive with no
appendix.
"Humans, yes," Virchow replied, "but not surgeons!"
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~~ My wife was so sick this morning
that I had to carry her to the kitchen to make my breakfast..
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~~ One evening I was commenting on my bad exercise habits
and tight clothes.
Whenever I criticize myself, my four-year-old daughter
always has something charming to say.
Using a new word this time, she smiled and said,
"Oh, no, Mommy! You look flabulous!"
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~~~ My great-grandson, age 5, spends a lot of time with us on
our small farm.
His big delight is finding the new "babies," whether they be birds
or mammals.
He also knows the rule, "New babies cannot be petted."
He usually waits impatiently until the new babies have grown
for a week or so and then he can pet them.
Recently our neighbors brought home their firstborn,
a beautiful little boy.
When I told my great-grandson they had a new baby,
he immediately began to ask to go visit them.
The second day, very early in the morning, he began to ask
to go visit again.
I explained to him that it was too early to visit, and that the
baby was probably still sleeping.
Hands on his hips and head cocked to one side,
he informed me, "But Grandma! I don't want to pet him;
I just want to look at him."
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~~ "FOR SALE: Eight puppies from a German shepherd and
an Alaskan hussy."
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~~ Spanish never came easily to my niece.
Still, she did her best to communicate with the Spanish-speaking
staff at the restaurant she managed.
But when she made mistakes...and she made a lot...
she'd apologize by saying, "Me estúpido."
Finally, a staffer took pity on her.
"Amanda, you're not estúpido," he said, bucking up my
niece's ego.
"You are a woman," he continued. "So you are estúpida."
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~~~ A blonde was eating her dinner when there was a ring at
her phone.
She answered it to find a telemarketer on the line.
She told him politely that she didn't want it and hung up.
She went back to dinner, and not long after, the telemarketer
called again.
"Take me off your list and have a nice day," she told him.
Ten minutes later, the same telemarketer called back.
"Listen, stop calling me and take me off your list!"
she screamed into the phone.
She returned to the phone a moment later with a note that
she stuck to the phone.
It read, "NO SOLICITING."
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~~~ QUESTION: How many rose enthusiasts does it take
to change a lightbulb?
ANSWER: One to gather the lightbulb, one to exhibit it and
a whole society to sniff, gather and talk about it.
.
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Todays Thought.....Golf is a game that was invented to punish those who retire early.
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