Sunday, October 18, 2009

Good Morning, Friends....Having a good weekend..?
I got 39ºf This morning.... I need to be with "Witchy"
were its nice and warm.........
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Now this is a cool dude......Bike King?....
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I don't know about this fellow.. I just couldn't.........
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Satanic leaf-tailed geckos (Uroplatus phantasticus)
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Your eating....so she must like you...Right??
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A south American dancer?.......cool...
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I didn't know they went together......I'll have to look it up.....
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"Witchy" is that you??.........
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Doesn't matter whats in it....just sign......
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Yea, Bubba....I'm tired too.... Oh, Well....It'll be better tomorrow...
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♥♥♥

~~ What did Dr. Frankenstein get when he put a goldfish brain

in the body of his dog?
I don't know, but it is great at chasing submarines.

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~~ A friend was assigned a new post teaching English to
inmates in prison.
Feeling a little nervous on his first day, he began by asking the
class a basic question:
"Now, who can tell me what a sentence is?"

.
~~ When a new child visited our Sunday school, the teacher
greeted him and asked his age.
The little boy held up four fingers.
"Oh, you're 4," said the teacher......
"And when will you be 5?"
The child stared at her and after a few seconds replied,
"When I hold up the other finger."

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~~ ice skating,   my Friend, Pete had a nasty fall, sliding six
metres across the ice, face down.
The rink doctor examined him and decided there was not much
he could do for Lou or the large bruise on his forehead.
Instead "Would you like some ice for that?" he offered.

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~~ Each morning at 7:00, I take my labrador, Lucky, for a walk.
He has the bad habit of picking up bits of paper or other trash
along the way.
When he does, I command him to "drop it," and he usually
complies.
One morning, though, he absolutely refused to drop a piece of litter.
So I told him to "sit" and then approached him to see what his
treasure was....... It was a $20 bill.

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~~ Our first three babies, all girls, each weighed about seven
pounds at birth.
When our fourth arrived, he was much larger.
After delivery, the medical team began testing and measuring
my new son.
The last reading came from a nurse, who seemed impressed
as she read, "Weight, nine pounds, eight ounces."
My husband, a CPA in corporate finance who'd been quiet up
to this point, could contain himself no longer.
"How about that!" my husband exclaimed happily.
"It's 36.5% more baby!"

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~~ Moses Montefiore, a nineteenth-century philanthropist,
was also a leader in Europe's Jewish community.
While at a dinner party he was surprised when a wealthy
man recounted his visit to Japan,
then insulted Montefiore by claiming,
"Japan has neither pigs nor Jews."
"You and I should go there," Montefiore retorted,
"so it will have a sample of each."

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~~ It looks like the days of the good nickel candy bar for a
dime are gone, too.

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~~ Watching a romantic ending to a Disney animated video,
my five- year-old sighed, "I hope I meet my prince someday,"
she said wistfully.
"You surely will," I reassured her.
"You know, I met my prince the day I met your daddy."
Puzzled, she turned to me..... "Who was he?" she asked.

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~~ Two blokes staggered into the pub, dragging their
extremely pissed mate with them.
When they reached the bar, they let him go and he collapsed
in a drunken heap on the floor.
"I'll have two beers," one of them slurred to the bartender.
"What about him?" asked the barkeep, pointing to the
unconscious chap.
"No more for him - he's driving," the patron answered.

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~~ A five-year-old boy surprised his father one day by saying,
"I guess I'll go outdoors and play ball with God."
"Tell me, how do you play ball with God?" asked the father.
"Oh, it's not hard at all," said the boy.
"I just throw the ball up and God throws it back down to me."

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~~ Our mom needed a new mattress for her antique bed,
so my brother and I decided to buy her one as a gift.
The problem was we weren't sure what to get,
because the bed was an odd size.
Fortunately, my brother happened to be visiting my mother
one day when I called home.
"Measure the bed frame before you leave," I told him.
"I don't have a tape measure."
"You can use a dollar bill," I suggested,
"each one is six inches long."
"Can't," he replied after digging through his wallet,
"I only have a ten."
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Todays Thought:   Sometimes silence is golden, other times it is just plain yellow.......
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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I've had a great time catching up after my 'walkabout' Smiles and laughs what more could you wish for? Thanks Gus
Rae x