I got the "Hump day" blues.... I need a trip..........
.
Sunrise, this morning...............
Damn......he thought I was homely.........
Oh, Yea, She's looking for breakfast......maybe that baby..↓
Oh, Yea, She's looking for breakfast......maybe that baby..↓.
She's showing us her baby.......cute?
She's showing us her baby.......cute?.
I don't know if I would try to give him a bath.... Scratch time!!
I don't know if I would try to give him a bath.... Scratch time!!.
In the right neighborhood, these miniature Jersey cows could live in your backyard and supply you with about 1 1/2 gallons of fresh milk per day.
In the right neighborhood, these miniature Jersey cows could live in your backyard and supply you with about 1 1/2 gallons of fresh milk per day..
What Happens in Oak Ridge, Stays in Oak Ridge: World War II-era billboard at the Oak Ridge Facility, part of the Manhattan Project.
What Happens in Oak Ridge, Stays in Oak Ridge: World War II-era billboard at the Oak Ridge Facility, part of the Manhattan Project..
Give me a nut or I'll poop on your shoe.........
Give me a nut or I'll poop on your shoe..........
Love birds......?
Love birds......?.
♥♥♥
~~~ Six-year-old son, Willie, was thrilled when the tooth fairy left him a dollar.
In the morning, as Willie got ready for school, he tucked the bill in his pocket.
Afraid he might lose it, I suggested he leave the money at home.
" I have to take it with me," Willie insisted.
"Some of my friends don't have enough money to buy chocolate milk."
Those kids sure have a terrific friend.
And Willie has one proud Mom.
.
~~~ A priest put up a signboard outside his church saying, "I pray for all."
A lawyer passing by wrote underneath,
"I plead for all."
" I prescribe for all," scribbled a doctor."
And I pay for all!" added a citizen.
.
~~~ As a nurse in a maternity unit, I've had to answer all kinds of questions from patients and their families.
I couldn't help but notice that one expectant father seemed particularly interested in the electronic fetal monitor.
"Would it hurt anything if I just turned this dial up and down from time to time?" he asked. "No," I answered, "but why would you want to do that?"
Smiling wistfully, the dad explained, "I know from experience it's the only time in a child's life I'll be able to control the volume."
.
~~~ What Dad says: "Don't forget to call your mother because she worries about you."
What Dad means: "I'm a nervous wreck when you drive at night, so call as soon as you get there."
.
~~~ I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I can ask where I left my glasses.
.
~~~ Returning from a trip to visit my grandmother in Maine, I was stopped by a state trooper in New York for exceeding the speed limit.
Grateful to have received a warning instead of a ticket, I gave him a small bag of my grandmother's delicious chocolate-chip cookies and proceeded on my way.
A short time later, I was stopped by another trooper.
"What have I done?" I asked.
"Nothing," the trooper said, smiling.
"I heard you were passing out great chocolate-chip cookies."
.
~~~ Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
.
~~~ My father had our two excitable dogs in the car.
Struggling to keep his eyes on the road, Dad yelled at them to behave as they jumped from seat to seat.
When Charcoal, our black Lab, leaped into the front seat, she landed on the car phone's "Send" button, automatically dialing the last person Dad had called.
Arriving home, Dad received a call from a customer he'd spoken to earlier in the day....
Okay, Ed!" exclaimed the man.... "I'll sit! I'll stay!"
.
~~~ The cost for attending this week's "Fasting and Prayer" conference includes meals.
.
~~~ QUESTION: How do you scare a man?
ANSWER: Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice.
.
~~~ The auto auction I attended was selling cars to benefit charity.
Vehicles were classified as either "Running" or "No Start."
On the block was a No Starter.
It had a shattered windshield, two missing tires, a sagging front bumper, a cockeyed grille, a hood that was sprung up at an angle, and dings and dents all over the body.
Before he started the bidding, the auctioneer announced the car's year, make and model, and then read the owner's comments: "Please note...the radio does not work."
.
~~~ Pete: I just flew in from Japan.
Gus: Gee, your arms must be tired.
.
.
Todays Thought: "No matter how far we travel, the memories will follow in the baggage car."
In the morning, as Willie got ready for school, he tucked the bill in his pocket.
Afraid he might lose it, I suggested he leave the money at home.
" I have to take it with me," Willie insisted.
"Some of my friends don't have enough money to buy chocolate milk."
Those kids sure have a terrific friend.
And Willie has one proud Mom.
.
~~~ A priest put up a signboard outside his church saying, "I pray for all."
A lawyer passing by wrote underneath,
"I plead for all."
" I prescribe for all," scribbled a doctor."
And I pay for all!" added a citizen.
.
~~~ As a nurse in a maternity unit, I've had to answer all kinds of questions from patients and their families.
I couldn't help but notice that one expectant father seemed particularly interested in the electronic fetal monitor.
"Would it hurt anything if I just turned this dial up and down from time to time?" he asked. "No," I answered, "but why would you want to do that?"
Smiling wistfully, the dad explained, "I know from experience it's the only time in a child's life I'll be able to control the volume."
.
~~~ What Dad says: "Don't forget to call your mother because she worries about you."
What Dad means: "I'm a nervous wreck when you drive at night, so call as soon as you get there."
.
~~~ I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I can ask where I left my glasses.
.
~~~ Returning from a trip to visit my grandmother in Maine, I was stopped by a state trooper in New York for exceeding the speed limit.
Grateful to have received a warning instead of a ticket, I gave him a small bag of my grandmother's delicious chocolate-chip cookies and proceeded on my way.
A short time later, I was stopped by another trooper.
"What have I done?" I asked.
"Nothing," the trooper said, smiling.
"I heard you were passing out great chocolate-chip cookies."
.
~~~ Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
.
~~~ My father had our two excitable dogs in the car.
Struggling to keep his eyes on the road, Dad yelled at them to behave as they jumped from seat to seat.
When Charcoal, our black Lab, leaped into the front seat, she landed on the car phone's "Send" button, automatically dialing the last person Dad had called.
Arriving home, Dad received a call from a customer he'd spoken to earlier in the day....
Okay, Ed!" exclaimed the man.... "I'll sit! I'll stay!"
.
~~~ The cost for attending this week's "Fasting and Prayer" conference includes meals.
.
~~~ QUESTION: How do you scare a man?
ANSWER: Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice.
.
~~~ The auto auction I attended was selling cars to benefit charity.
Vehicles were classified as either "Running" or "No Start."
On the block was a No Starter.
It had a shattered windshield, two missing tires, a sagging front bumper, a cockeyed grille, a hood that was sprung up at an angle, and dings and dents all over the body.
Before he started the bidding, the auctioneer announced the car's year, make and model, and then read the owner's comments: "Please note...the radio does not work."
.
~~~ Pete: I just flew in from Japan.
Gus: Gee, your arms must be tired.
.
.
Todays Thought: "No matter how far we travel, the memories will follow in the baggage car."
1 comment:
Lov'em all today...Looking for Thursdays...I see you slept in today..... he he he ..
Pete
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