And the Isp is slow this morning.....
.
Storm clouds from yesterday.......
Nice rocker.....huh!.....
A blue button jellyfish..... I an't swimming with him!
A blue button jellyfish..... I an't swimming with him!.
A babby just rolling around....
A babby just rolling around.....
Wanna go swimming?.....just a wee bit crowed, Huh!
Wanna go swimming?.....just a wee bit crowed, Huh!.
Bobbie....the baby's hungry.....get the milk ready........ 
Bobbie....the baby's hungry.....get the milk ready.........
My buddy "Pete" out side my window.., has fleas.......loves dry cat food...
Yea.....
My buddy "Pete" out side my window.., has fleas.......loves dry cat food....
Yea......
♥♥♥
~~~ You're in a room with no doors and no windows, and all you have is a baseball bat.
How do you get out?
Strike 1! Strike 2! Strike 3! You're out!
.
~~~ You know you are getting old when your broad mind and narrow waist have exchanged places.
.
~~~ A lovely young couple is doing some shopping in town.
Having purchased everything they need, they return to the parking lot to drive home.
Where's the car?..... Good golly, someone has stolen it!
They notify the police from a phone booth inside the mall and make a report at the Police station.
A young detective drives them back to see if any evidence remains from the scene of the crime. But, what do you know, there is the stolen car, back in the exact spot!
A note is on the windshield with two tickets to a concert attached.
The note thanks the young couple for the use of their car, but the culprit's wife was about to give birth and had to be rushed to the hospital.
The young couple's faith in humanity is restored and they go to the concert and have a wonderful time.
They arrive home late that night to find their entire house robbed, with a note on the door reading, "Well, I gotta put the kid through college, don't I?"
.
~~~ A young minister, in his first days at his first parish, is obliged to conduct the funeral services for an eccentric man who has just died.
At the funeral home, he stands before the open casket and tries to think of words to console the widow.
Finally, the minister says, "I know this must be a very hard blow, Mrs. Jones.
But we must remember that what we see here is only the husk, the shell.....
The nut has gone to heaven."
.
~~~ As three-year-old Kathy and her parents were leaving the church service, the pastor shook the little girl's hand and said, "It was so nice to see you in church this morning."
Just then Kathy noticed a young woman wearing a leopard print blouse.
She pointed and exclaimed loudly, "Hey, Daddy!.
That lady's shirt matches your underpants."
.
~~~ To handle yourself, use your head; To handle others, use your heart.
.
~~~ Over heard on a morning radio talk show:
DJ #1: A local hospital plays the Brahm's Lullaby each time a baby is born.
DJ #2: Well do they play anything when an individual dies?
DJ #1: I don't know........ Maybe "Th-th-th-that's all folks!"
.
~~~ CAT PRAYERNow I lay me down to sleep, I pray this cushy life to keep.
I pray for toys that look like mice,And sofa cushions, soft and nice.
I pray for gourmet kitty snacks, And someone nice to scratch my back, For windowsills all warm and bright, For shadows to explore at night.
I pray I'll always stay real cool, And keep the secret feline rule.
To NEVER tell a human that...The world is really ruled by CATS!
.
~~~ Sherry announced to her family, "Tomorrow morning I'm going to make an old-fashioned breakfast with eggs, ham, biscuits and home fries."
Three-year-old Wyatt groaned, "But, Mommy, you know I don't like eggs."
Sherry then reminded Wyatt of all the food the little boy liked that contained eggs.
The next morning, when Wyatt walked into the kitchen, Sherry said, "Since you are here first, you can decide for the family.
How do you want me to cook the eggs?"
Wyatt answered, "In chocolate cake, please."
.
~~~ The manager of a jewelry store nabs a shoplifter trying to steal a necklace.
"Listen," the crook says, "you don't want any trouble, and neither do I.
What do you say I just buy the necklace and we forget this ever happened?"
The manager agrees and writes up a sales slip.
"You know," says the crook, "this is more than I wanted to spend.
Got anything less expensive?"
.
~~~ Do for others with no desire of returned favor.
We all should plant some trees we'll never sit under.
.
~~~ A mother cat was teaching her kitten cat lore.
She explained that this was the duty of all mother cats since before recorded history and it was important that her kitten would not do anything to embarrass her when she allowed her master to play with her.
At the end of the lesson, after she had gone over all the cat rules such as ignoring anything the human might say, she asked her kitten if there was question she might want to ask.
The kitten said, "Momma, you have given me all the situations a cat might get into and the proper cat-responses but, what should I do if a new situation comes up that you haven't covered?"
Momma cat responded, "Oh my gosh! I'm SO glad you asked that.
I've gotten into so many rules that I forgot the most important first rule!
"Kitten asked: "What is that, Momma?"
Momma drew up and looked kitten right in the eye and said: "When in doubt...wash!"
.
~~~ A five-year-old was discussing Noah's Ark with Grandma.
Grandma asked, "How many animals went into the Ark?"
The youngster replied: "One mail and one e-mail."
.
~~~ A police officer noticed my friend carrying her screaming daughter out of a shopping mall one day.
Apparently concerned for the child, he asked, "Is that your daughter?"
My friend's answer left no doubt as to the child's identity.
In exasperation she replied, "If she wasn't mine, I wouldn't be taking her home!"
.
.
Todays Thought; "People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life."
.
How do you get out?
Strike 1! Strike 2! Strike 3! You're out!
.
~~~ You know you are getting old when your broad mind and narrow waist have exchanged places.
.
~~~ A lovely young couple is doing some shopping in town.
Having purchased everything they need, they return to the parking lot to drive home.
Where's the car?..... Good golly, someone has stolen it!
They notify the police from a phone booth inside the mall and make a report at the Police station.
A young detective drives them back to see if any evidence remains from the scene of the crime. But, what do you know, there is the stolen car, back in the exact spot!
A note is on the windshield with two tickets to a concert attached.
The note thanks the young couple for the use of their car, but the culprit's wife was about to give birth and had to be rushed to the hospital.
The young couple's faith in humanity is restored and they go to the concert and have a wonderful time.
They arrive home late that night to find their entire house robbed, with a note on the door reading, "Well, I gotta put the kid through college, don't I?"
.
~~~ A young minister, in his first days at his first parish, is obliged to conduct the funeral services for an eccentric man who has just died.
At the funeral home, he stands before the open casket and tries to think of words to console the widow.
Finally, the minister says, "I know this must be a very hard blow, Mrs. Jones.
But we must remember that what we see here is only the husk, the shell.....
The nut has gone to heaven."
.
~~~ As three-year-old Kathy and her parents were leaving the church service, the pastor shook the little girl's hand and said, "It was so nice to see you in church this morning."
Just then Kathy noticed a young woman wearing a leopard print blouse.
She pointed and exclaimed loudly, "Hey, Daddy!.
That lady's shirt matches your underpants."
.
~~~ To handle yourself, use your head; To handle others, use your heart.
.
~~~ Over heard on a morning radio talk show:
DJ #1: A local hospital plays the Brahm's Lullaby each time a baby is born.
DJ #2: Well do they play anything when an individual dies?
DJ #1: I don't know........ Maybe "Th-th-th-that's all folks!"
.
~~~ CAT PRAYERNow I lay me down to sleep, I pray this cushy life to keep.
I pray for toys that look like mice,And sofa cushions, soft and nice.
I pray for gourmet kitty snacks, And someone nice to scratch my back, For windowsills all warm and bright, For shadows to explore at night.
I pray I'll always stay real cool, And keep the secret feline rule.
To NEVER tell a human that...The world is really ruled by CATS!
.
~~~ Sherry announced to her family, "Tomorrow morning I'm going to make an old-fashioned breakfast with eggs, ham, biscuits and home fries."
Three-year-old Wyatt groaned, "But, Mommy, you know I don't like eggs."
Sherry then reminded Wyatt of all the food the little boy liked that contained eggs.
The next morning, when Wyatt walked into the kitchen, Sherry said, "Since you are here first, you can decide for the family.
How do you want me to cook the eggs?"
Wyatt answered, "In chocolate cake, please."
.
~~~ The manager of a jewelry store nabs a shoplifter trying to steal a necklace.
"Listen," the crook says, "you don't want any trouble, and neither do I.
What do you say I just buy the necklace and we forget this ever happened?"
The manager agrees and writes up a sales slip.
"You know," says the crook, "this is more than I wanted to spend.
Got anything less expensive?"
.
~~~ Do for others with no desire of returned favor.
We all should plant some trees we'll never sit under.
.
~~~ A mother cat was teaching her kitten cat lore.
She explained that this was the duty of all mother cats since before recorded history and it was important that her kitten would not do anything to embarrass her when she allowed her master to play with her.
At the end of the lesson, after she had gone over all the cat rules such as ignoring anything the human might say, she asked her kitten if there was question she might want to ask.
The kitten said, "Momma, you have given me all the situations a cat might get into and the proper cat-responses but, what should I do if a new situation comes up that you haven't covered?"
Momma cat responded, "Oh my gosh! I'm SO glad you asked that.
I've gotten into so many rules that I forgot the most important first rule!
"Kitten asked: "What is that, Momma?"
Momma drew up and looked kitten right in the eye and said: "When in doubt...wash!"
.
~~~ A five-year-old was discussing Noah's Ark with Grandma.
Grandma asked, "How many animals went into the Ark?"
The youngster replied: "One mail and one e-mail."
.
~~~ A police officer noticed my friend carrying her screaming daughter out of a shopping mall one day.
Apparently concerned for the child, he asked, "Is that your daughter?"
My friend's answer left no doubt as to the child's identity.
In exasperation she replied, "If she wasn't mine, I wouldn't be taking her home!"
.
.
Todays Thought; "People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life."
.
.
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