Saturday, June 6, 2009

Good Morning....65 Years Ago......D day...
We lost a lot of our good men....
Never forget them...
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Ant one for a "Coke"?
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Just Chillin out.........

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Camel snack??

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Good beer....huh!

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Have a "cold one!"..........

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"I'm not drinking wif no drunk dog"......

. Got me a Seal.......... "Witchy is proud of me...."

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♥♥♥

~~~ Give a man a fish and you have fed him for a day, but give him a case of dynamite and soon the village will be showered with mud and seaweed and unidentifiable chunks of fish.

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~~~ "Burger King is adding a new kids' meal that's lower in fat, sodium and calories.
It's called the 'I Don't Want That."

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~~~ Bobbie, and I are close, and that allows us to be honest with each other.
As I fidgeted in front of the mirror one evening before a date, I remarked, "I'm fat."
"No, you're not," she scolded.
"My hair is awful."
"It's lovely."
"I've never looked worse," I whined.
"Yes, you have," she replied.

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~~~ The judge had not yet put in an appearance in the Greene county traffic court.
When the bailiff entered the courtroom, he sensed the nervousness of the traffic offenders awaiting their ordeal."Good morning, ladies and gentlemen," he said.
"Welcome to 'What's My Fine?"

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~~~ I was having trouble with the idea of turning 60 and was oversensitive to any signs of advancing age.
When I found a prominent grey hair in my hair, I pointed to my forehead.
"Have you seen this?"... I indignantly asked Bobbie.
"What?" she asked...... "The wrinkles?"

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~~~ In hindsight I should have been more specific.
I was visiting my doctor as part of a checkup after surgery.
"When can I resume regular activities?" I asked.
He blushed slightly.....
"You mean like sex?"
"Actually, I was thinking of vacuuming."

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~~~ Most of us in the driver-safety class were stumped.
We simply didn't have an answer for the instructor's question.
So he called on a soft-spoken man and posed the situation to him.
"What's the difference between an aggressive driver and a driver suffering from road rage?"
"A pistol," came the answer.
~~~ "Keep making that face and it's going to freeze that way," was what my mother used to say to us as kids.
I knew times had changed after she noticed my sister scowling recently and warned, "Keep making that face and you're going to need Botox."

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~~~ A friend and I used to run a small temporary-staffing service.
Our agency did mandatory background checks on all job candidates, even though our application form asked them if they'd ever been convicted of a crime.
One day after a round of interviews, my co- worker was entering information from a young man's application into the computer.
She called me over to show me that he had noted a previous conviction for second-degree manslaughter.
Below that, on the line listing his skill, he had written, "Good with people."

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Todays Thought: Political difference is wholesome.
It is political indifference that hurts.
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