Good Morning.....well it's a 24º degrees chilly morning.....
weather can't make up its mind...
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The cat is sleeping.....Lookin funny.........
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She thought that the cat looks funny........

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Lunch is served...................
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Fightin over food........Just wait a year from now....no fight.

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Nice tree house.....

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Kissie...kissie................................

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Nice picture.........................

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He's having fun..........

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♥♥♥

~~~ An immigrant, Abe Cohen, went out and bought a book and studied it from cover to cover so that he would know the law of the United States.

Finally, he went to get his papers.

"Who makes the laws of the United States?" asked the judge.

Without a moment's hesitation Cohen replied,"Friedman the printer, your honor."

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~~~ Once a compact was a popular gift for a sixteen-year-old girl; it still is today - if it has four wheels.

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~~~ It was a particularly busy day at the bank when a woman stormed up to the customer service counter and demanded in a loud voice, "What do I have to do to change the address on my account?"

Without even looking up the cashier said, "Simple, madam, you have to move!"

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~~~ When Lionel Barrymore first saw "Friends" (one of his first films) on the big screen, he was astonished by his appearance.

"Am I really that fat?" he asked his co-star Mary Pickford.

"I want you to tell me the truth, little girl.

Am I that fat?"

"I'm sorry, Mr. Barrymore," Pickford reluctantly replied, "but you are."

"That does it," he declared.

"No more beer for me."
He kept his word, dieting, jogging regularly through Central Park (wearing four sweaters), and gradually slimming down.

One day several years later, he happened to pass a Broadway theater boasting "LIONEL BARRYMORE INSIDE."

Out of curiosity, he went in to see one of his early films and was amused to overhear some female patrons gossiping about him:

"That's Lionel Barrymore?" one woman exclaimed.

"Why, I saw him week before last and he was as thin as the number eleven on a door!

How could he get so fat so soon?"

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~~~ When a person with experience meets a person with money, the person with experience will get the money, and the person with the money will get some experience.

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~~~ Gus sez; If you want to fish, you'll need bait.

The best bait is worms.

All you do is impale the worm on the hook, and toss it in the water.

The fish will nibble on it until it's gone, then they'll give the hook a gentle tug to let you know it's time to send another worm down.

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~~~ Sue told me: I was turning 40 and decided to celebrate by fulfilling my long- time dream to go sky-diving.

Before the jump, my mother and I spent the day at a festival, where we bumped into two of my cousins.

They inquired about my birthday, and when I told them about my jump from 10,000 feet, I could tell they were mystified.

Finally one of them said, "Why don't you just get your breasts done, like everyone else?"

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~~~ "Did you have any trouble with your Spanish when you were abroad?"
"No" but the Spanish did."

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Todays Thought: Age doesn't always bring wisdom.....Sometimes age comes first.

Good Morning...People of the world....Welcome to Gus's place in the world...
Things getter warmer, grass is coming up, and flowers and trees blooming.
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Some Daffies blooming along Hummingbird Lane.......
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Now, I ask you an't it cute???

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Whoa, big guy......He's tied on...so I guess he's breaking him to ride...

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This Poney has the shortest legs I've ever seen.....

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Oh, my....thats gotta hurt the pocketbook.....

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Bobbie sent me this cool picture..from Fla.

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I don't know about this one....I would think twice before riding........

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My buddie....Eno.

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~~~ "Over the weekend in D.C., first lady Michelle Obama was at a homeless shelter serving food to the homeless.

Isn't that nice? Reaching out to the middle class." -Jay Leno

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~~~Ever notice,
The older we get, The more we'reLike computers?

We start out with lots of Memory and drive, Then we eventually Become outdated,

Crash at odd moments, Acquire errors in our systems, And have to have our parts replaced!

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~~~ What a bargain grandchildren are!

I give them my loose change, and they give me a million dollars' worth of pleasure.

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~~~ Gus and Pete went into the fancy restaurant and ordered the de luxe dinner with all the trimmings.

Then Pete haughtily called for the manager.

"There's a fly in my soup," he said angrily to the distraught man.

"This is terrible, horrible, awful.

I never expected such a thing to happen in this place of all places. "

Ssh," pleaded the manager.

"Not so loud.

These things can happen.

Won't you gentlemen have dinner on the house?"

After dinner the two men left and Pete pointed to a drugstore across the street.

"Could you go for an ice cream soda?" he asked Gus.

"I've got one more fly left."

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~~~ "The Obamas are expecting the arrival of the first dog in April.

Actually, this will be the Obamas' second choice of a dog.

The first dog had some tax problems." -Jay Leno

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~~~ It is immoral to use a photograph of a glowing sixteen-year-old to sell a cream aimed at preventing wrinkles in a forty-year-old.

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~~~ A woman threatened to call police after claiming that she’d been locked in by hotal staff. When in fact, she had mistaken the “do not disturb” sign on the back of the door as a warning to remain in the room.

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Todays thought; If a thing is worth doing, it would have been done already.

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Good Morning.....Kinda in a hurry this morning....
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A hummingbird sunrise..........
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A Florida sunset...

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They don't like the water.....
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Oh...what big ears you have.....

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Wow.......

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Not a good place to park......

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Been playing in the snow........

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~~~ 2 OLD LADIES IN CHURCH ...
One leans over to the other and says, "I think my butt is asleep."

The other replies, "Yeah, I could hear it snoring a few minutes ago."

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~~~ A wife to her husband, Darling, my mother is visiting us tomorrow, why don't you take her somewhere?
I always take her somewhere when she visits, but she always finds her way back

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~~~ BOSS: Why are you late?
MALE EMPLOYEE: I didn't look where I was going and I ran into a tree.
BOSS: That's a new one.

I never heard of sap running into a tree!

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~~~ This guy couldn`t decide whether to go to Salt Lake City or Denver for vacation, so he called the airlines to get prices.

"Airfare to Denver is $300," said a cheery salesperson.

"And what about Salt Lake City?"

"We have a really great rate to Salt Lake--$99.00, but there is a stopover."

"Where?"....

"Denver."

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~~~ There's a new baby food on the market.

It's half orange juice and half garlic.

It not only makes the baby healthier, but also easier to find in the dark.

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~~~ For her surgery to fuse some vertebrae in her neck, my niece planned ahead.

She knew she would have to wear a brace with four steel rods screwed into her skull and attached to a rigid upper- body cast during her recovery, so she brought to the hospital several sweatshirts that were cut to fit over these appliances.

On her first trip out of her hospital room, she ventured to the cafeteria wearing a shirt bearing the message, "I'd lose my head it is wasn't screwed on"

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~~~ A big, burly man visited the pastor's home and asked to see the minister's wife, a woman well known for her charitable impulses.

"Madam," he said in a broken voice, "I wish to draw your attention to the terrible plight of a poor family in this district.

The father is dead, the mother is too ill to work, and the nine children are starving.

They are about to be turned into the cold, empty streets unless someone pays their rent, which amounts to $400."

"How terrible!" exclaimed the preacher's wife.

"May I ask who you are?"

The sympathetic visitor applied his handkerchief to his eyes.

"I'm the landlord," he sobbed

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~~~ While reading a newspaper, Gus came across an article about a beautiful actress marrying a football player who was not noted for his IQ.

"I'll never understand," he said to his wife, "Why do the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives."

His wife replied, "Why, thank you, dear."

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~~~ Although we were to be married in Ohio, I wanted a touch of my home state, Kansas, in the wedding.

I told a friend that we were going to toss wheat, not rice, after the ceremony.

My friend thought about it and said, "It's lucky you're not from Idaho!"

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Todays thought: Don't tear your hair out over a woman.

It will be harder to meet the next one if you're bald.

Good Morning friends....Little late this morning...Doctors Day yesterday.

so running catch up today....

Of course the guy from Waynesburgs gotta rag me...Good morning "Pete"

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These Kestrels are some pretty birds.........

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Some one made him mad..........
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Food art..........................................

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That said........................

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Now see what you did, Pete..?... I always said you weren't right......

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Bad spelling......must be then Waynesburg boys..........

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Well you spent hours digging it out....Were are you going?

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♥♥♥

~~~ "Doc, I bought a six-acre farm," Mr. Martin told his analyst.

"It's beautiful. Absolutely the last word.

I have an acre of peach trees, then an empty acre.

An acre of cherry trees, then an empty acre.

And an acre of plum trees then an empty acre."
"What's the idea of the empty acres?"

"I gotta have some place to throw the pits."

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~~~ "I haven't seen my husband for eleven years," the wife said.

"Be patient," advised the lawyer.

"Maybe he's taken up golf."

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~~~ Gus.."Lady Godiva was the first lady jockey.

"Pete.."Did she win"Gus..

"No. But she certainly showed."

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~~~ A longtime committee member gave some advice to a newcomer:

"Never arrive on time, or you will be stamped as a beginner.

Do not speak until the meeting is half over, this stamps you as being wise.

Finally, be as vague as possible this avoids irritating the others."

( Damn...sounds like congress.)

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~~~ It was the age-old battle of the sexes, but this time on a so- called intellectual level.

"Do men go to heaven?" asked the lady professor.

"Why yes," replied the visiting lecturer.
"I never saw a picture of an angel with a beard."

"True," agreed the speaker.

"They all get there by a close shave."

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~~~ Men forget everything. women remember everything.

That's why men need instant replays in sports.

They've already forgotten what happened.

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~~~ The coach says to him, "Tex, grab that ball and run down the field with it."
So he grabbed it and ran ninety yards with nary a one of 'em layin' a hand on him.

When he ran back the coach says, "Okay, now take off your spurs and let me see you do it."

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~~~ She did a terrific rhumba.

Learned it on the farm when she was a little girl.

Drove a tractor with a loose seat.

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~~~ What is a debtor, Pete?"

Gus, "A man who owes money."
"And what is a creditor?"

"The man who thinks he is going to get it."

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Todays thought: In ye olden days folks used to wine and dine, now they dine and whine.

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<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<☼>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Good Morning Everyone....And Happy ST. PATRICKS day .........
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Waiting for them to say: Bud Wise er..........
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Weird...weird I say.........

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Ouch! You know that hurt.......

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Oh, Oh...You saved the vase.......but thats not good......

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Too much Green Beer.......................................

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Got more nerve than me..........

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Look alikes...................

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♥♥♥

~~~ It is unfortunate we can't buy many business executives for what they are worth and sell them for what they think they are worth.
- Malcolm Forbes

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~~~ Sign on a high-school bulletin board:

"Free every Monday through Friday, knowledge.

Bring your own containers."

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~~~ I was just reading the back of my bank statement and saw the following change from a few months ago......

"When balancing your checkbook, don't really give too much thought to the numbers.

Numbers are overrated anyway and quite frankly, we find them a bit facist.

Anyway, when you do appear to be overdrawn, just do like we're doing and ask for a bailout. We'll consider the request, and we might not even charge you our obscenely ridiculous overdraft fees as we bilk the government for billions because we can't manage our business any better than you can manage your checkbook.

Only differnce is, we'll get our money and you'll get our fees!

Have a nice day!......

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~~~ Have you ever noticed that some folks' hobbies demand more hard work than they would be willing to do for a living?

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~~~ This very pregnant woman made her way to the nurses' main desk in our hospital's labour-and-delivery ward.

Her mind understandably elsewhere, she explained, "I'm here to be seduced."

Nurse just smiled at her and replied, "I think you already have been."

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~~~ Flummoxed by his true-false final exam, a student decides to toss a coin up in the air. Heads means true; tails, false.

Thirty minutes later, he's done, well before the rest of the class.

But then the student starts flipping the coin again.

And soon he's swearing and sweating over each question.
"What's wrong?" asks the concerned teacher.

"I'm rechecking my answers," says says the student.

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~~~ With traffic the way it is today, we should get a medal for parking instead of a ticket

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Todays thought: Liquidity: When you look at your investments and wet your pants.

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♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣

Good Morning.....Ready for a new week?
Still rain today.....but better, rest of the week...
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Everything is getting green for tomorrow......
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The little people better watch out..........
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These Cardinals are pretty.... We have quite a few here.....

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Oh....yah....Bacon on the hoof.........

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A baby Matschie's tree kangaroo......

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Cool...photoshopped picture...
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I just don't know........????

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Red neck McDonalds........

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♥♥♥

~~~ My girl "Witchy" is very forward in some ways.

Last night she turned the lights lower than my intentions.

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~~~ The tale of the errant entrepreneur:

High chair;

high school;

high hopes;

high finance;

"Hi, Warden!".

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~~~ I always thought horse racing was the national pastime.... then one day I saw Playboy.

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~~~ Patient: How much will the operation cost?

Doctor: A thousand dollars.
Patient: A thousand dollars! Can't you do it for less?

Doctor: Sorry, that's a cut rate price.

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~~~ Tony took two enthusiastic swings at the golf ball and missed both times.

He looked up at his companion and said, "That's funny -

this course is two inches lower than the one I usually play."

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~~~ VISITOR: My friend was run over by a steamroller and he's in this hospital.

What room is he in?
NURSE: Room #105, #106, #107, and #108.

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~~~ YOU'RE IN SUCH BAD SHAPE!.....

HOW BAD IS IT?
You're in such bad shape, you breathe hard when your stocking runs.
You're in such bad shape, you couldn't even strike a match.
You're in such bad shape, I hear undertakers come up to you and give estimates.
You're in such bad shape, if a vampire bit you, all it would get is practice.
You're in such bad shape, if you tried to run a bath, you'd come in second.
And finally, you're in such bad shape, you look like you're walking around just to save on funeral expenses.

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~~~ A vacationer was driving along a country road when it bagen to rain hard.

Soon the road turned to mud.

Seeing a farmhouse, he knocked on the door and asked the farmer if he could stay overnight.
"Sure," said the farmer, "but you'll have to make your own bed."

"That's all right," replied the vacationer."

Okay," said the farmer.

"Here's some wood and a hammer."

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Todays thought; Adolescence is that period when a young guy can show off the finest crop of hair he will ever have.

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Good Morning....this nice rainy day....Grass is shooting up...
Thats a good sign.... I love "Bit-o-Honeys....am I the only one?
I keep a candy jar with them beside the puter......
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Hey! watch it.....your spilling the water out of the picture.....
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Wow....that would scare the devil out of me.........

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Like the cows....Onion breath..............................

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Yep, he does.............................................

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Another good fit.........keep Milo away......so he won't say hurtful things.....

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On sale?

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Man....I bet it hurt.......Them horns will do it every time.........

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♥♥♥

~~~ Said an envious, erudite ermine.

"There's one thing I cannot determine:When a girl wears my coat She's a person of note.

When I wear it, I'm called only vermin."

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~~~ In going back to my small hometown for a reunion, I was surprised at the changes I saw until a sign in front of the grocery store made me realize that the old values still existed.

The sign said: "We accept Visa, Master Card, Eggs."

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~~~ "A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space.

On the back it said, 'Wish you were here.'"

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~~~ A man walked into a bar on a slow night and sat down.

After a few minutes, the bartender asked him if he wanted a drink.

He replied, "No thanks. I don't drink.

I tried it once, but I didn't like it."
So the bartender said, "Well, would you like a cigarette?"

But the man said, "No thanks.

I don't smoke.

I tried it once, but I didn't like it."
The bartender asked him if he'd like to play a game of pool, and again the man said, "No thanks. I don't like pool.

I tried it once, but I didn't like it.

As a matter of fact, I wouldn't be here at all, but I'm waiting for my son."
The bartender said, "Your only son, I'm guessing."

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~~~ Two doctors opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology."
The town council was not happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to "Hysterias and Posteriors."
This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council they changed the sign to "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids. "

No go.
Next, they tried "Catatonics and High Colonics."

Thumbs down again.
Then came "Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives."

Still no good.
Another attempt resulted in "Minds and Behinds."

Unacceptable again.
So they tried "Lost Souls and Butt Holes."

No way.
"Analysis and Anal Cysts?"

Nope.
"Nuts and Butts? "

Uh uh.
"Freaks and Cheeks?"

Still no go.
"Loons and Moons?"

Forget it.
Almost at their wit's end, the doctors finally came up with:

"Dr Smith and Dr. Jones,..... Odds and Ends."
Everyone loved it!

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~~~ A salesman, and engineer, and a technician are driving in a car when, just outside of town, they get a flat tire.

The three of them get out of the car and scratch their heads.

The salesman says, "Maybe I should walk into town and get us a new tire.

I know that I can bargain with the man at the parts store and get us a great deal."
The engineer stops him, saying,

"No, before you do that, we'll have to do some computations, figuring the grade of the road, the asphalt temperature, and the average rate of speed we will be traveling to know what kind of tire you should buy."
The technician laughs and shakes his head.

"No, no, no! What's wrong with you guys?

Hell, we have a spare tire in the trunk - now all we have to do is start swapping tires until we find the flat one!"

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Todays Thought: I misplaced my dictionary....

Now I'm at a loss for words.

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