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A lotta trouble to kiss a cow.....
.
A pretty Lilly.......................................... .
Sumtum smells.............................................
.
.
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A few weeks after a young woman had been employed,
she was called into the Human Resources administrator's office.
"What is the meaning of this?" the personnel officer asked.
"When you applied for this job, you told us you had three years experience.
Now I have discovered this is the first position you've ever held."
"True", the young woman answered with a smile,
"in your advertisement you said you wanted a person with imagination."
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I had given our daughter, who was 14 at the time, a drivers manual.
On the way to town one day, I was coaching her as I drove.
I told her to be studying her book so as to be ready when it came
time to get her drivers permit.
"Oh, she said, "I already know everything in the book."
"You do?" I returned.
"Yep", she said, very smugly.
I thought, "OK, I'll give her a hard one.
"So I asked her, "How many feet does it take to stop the car
if you are driving 60 miles an hour and have to slam on the brakes real hard?"
"One," she replied.
"What?" I asked. "One?!
"She repeated her answer and then because of the confused look on my face,
she added, "One Dad. You always told me never to use my left foot on the brakes,
only use my right one."
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"You know you're getting fat when you sit in your bathtub and the water in the toilet rises."
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Did you know that in writing reports,
proctologists only use colons,
OB/GYNs only use periods,
and neurologists only use commas.
+
One of the local television stations in South Louisiana aired an
interview with a woman from New Orleans .
The interviewer was a woman from a Boston affiliate.
She asked the New Orleans woman how such total and complete
devastation of the churches in the area had affected their lives.
Without hesitation, the woman replied,
'I don't know about all those other people,
but we haven't gone to Churches in years.
We gits all our chicken from Popeye's'.
The look on the interviewer's face was priceless.
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