Damn...calling for snow for the weekend.....

Smart parrot........

I'm keeping my mouth shut !

Ponder this.....

*It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always

room temperature.

*I bought some batteries, but they weren't included.

*Everywhere is walking distance, if you have the time.

*I used to work in a fire hydrant factory.

You couldn't park anywhere near the place.

*I bought some instant water, but didn't have anything to mix it up with.

*How come the sewer treatment plants in every town in america has

more barbed wire fencing and security around it then most minimum

security prisons? do they have that many people trying to steal the ••••?

* I happen to KNOW the answer to that last one,

btw it's NOT to keep people from stealing the s h i t it's to KEEP them

from throwing the politicians IN..... clogs up the outlets,

and there's SOME things even a self-respecting treatment plant worker

doesn't wanna touch!

On a recent flight, an elderly passenger kept peering out the window.

Since it was totally dark, all she could see was the blinking wing-tip light.

Finally, she rang for the flight attendant.
"I'm sorry to bother you," she said, "but I think you should inform the

pilot that his left-turn indicator is on and has been for some time."