Silly Goose...
I don't know...
I grew up eating these.....
••
♥
I don't know if laughter is the "best" medicine,
but I do like that it doesn't have a $35 co-pay.
••
Senior's Texting Code for all my blogger Friends;
BMH - Broke My Hip
OMMR - On My Massage Recliner
TOT - Texting on Toilet
LOL - Little Old Lady
LMDO - Laughing My Dentures Out
FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
CBM - Covered By Medicare
HGBM - Had Good Bowel Movement
WAITT - Who Am I Talking To
BFF - Best Friends Funeral
IMHO - Is My Hearing Aid On
ROFLACGU - Rolling On The Floor Laughing, Can't Get Up
TTML - Talk To Me Louder
BTW - Bring The Wheelchair
ATD - At The Doctors
BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
WTFA - Wet the Furniture Again
OMSG - Oh My, Sorry Gas
GGPBL - Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
BFF - Best Friend Fell
••
“I started dating the girl across the street.
I know what people say, but honestly, lawn
distance relationships aren't that hard.”
••
When they put "unknown" at the end of a quote,
that means they probably don't know how to spell
anonymous -
••
Just scrached my crotch while trying to
swat a fly and four people told me I was a good
dancer.
••
As I was going through my wallet,
for a second I thought I got robbed...
And then I remembered I got gas.
••
I have gotten outta bed 365 days a year for 37 years.
That is 13,505 sit-ups.
And not ONE ab to show for it.
••
I just gave my secretary a baby shower.
Well, a potential baby shower.
If you know what I mean.
••
Tom had this problem of getting up late in the
morning and was always late for work.
His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire
him if he didn't do something about it.
So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill
and told him to take it before he went to bed.
Tom slept well and in fact beat the alarm in the
morning by almost two hours.
He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully
to work.
"Boss," he said, "The pill actually worked!"
"That's all fine" said the boss,
"But where were you yesterday?"
••
Scientists have discovered that people will believe
anything when you say "scientists have discovered
that"...
••
Sometimes I think I should introduce myself
to my neighbors just so they don't describe me to the
police as "Quiet and keeps to himself."
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