••
♥
Boxing legend Muhammad Ali in hospital
with pneumonia.
6 nurses are said to have suffered mild
concussion after his attempts to shake their
hands.
••
When Parker Pen marketed a ball-point pen in
Mexico, its ads were supposed to have read,
"It won’t leak in your pocket and embarrass you."
The company thought that the word "embarazar"
(to impregnate) meant to embarrass, so the ad
read: "It won’t leak in your pocket and make
you pregnant."
••
I was in a bar last weekend and probably more
than just a tad drunk.
I mistakenly picked up a 'Shemale'.
I brought 'her' back to my motel room.
Wow, that was a real shocker!
In hindsight, I guess her Adam's Apple should
have given me a clue.
But I just figured she had a goiter or something.
••
I'd have more sympathy for Sony's alleged loss
of $200 million if that weren't the cost of like
three large popcorns at any movie theater.
••
Two muslims have crashed a speed boat into the
Thames Barrier, Police think this could be the
start of Ram a Dam.
••
Did you hear about the new household cleaner
just put on the market?
It's called "Bachelor."
Why?
Because it works fast, and leaves no ring.
••
Paul is coming over tonight.
Paul smith or Paul who puts ketchup on
everything?
[car pulls into driveway covered in ketchup]
••
Milk is spoiled when it starts to look like yogurt.
Yogurt is spoiled when it starts to look like
cottage cheese.
Cottage cheese is spoiled when it starts to look
like regular cheese.
Regular cheese is nothing but spoiled milk
anyway and can't get any more spoiled than it is
already.
Cheddar cheese is spoiled when you think it is
blue cheese but you realize you've never
purchased that kind.
••
A Jewish guy's mother gives him two sweaters
for Hanukkah.
The next time he visits her, he makes sure to
wear one.
As he walks into the house, his mother frowns
and asks, "What -- you didn't like the other one?"
••
General Motors had a very famous fiasco in
trying to market the Nova car in Central and
South America.
"No va" in Spanish means, "It Doesn’t Go".
••••
