Birds like ice cream too..........................
Gonna be awhile...........
One way to mow the lawn............
Someones in a heap of trouble................
Their hungry.....momma........
*
For Father's Day, my colleague suggested our seventh class make her foolproof
strawberry freezer jam.
With the recipe printed on the chalkboard, we began.
Unfortunately, instead of adding two cups of crushed strawberries as required,
the children measured out two cups of whole berries, which they then crushed.
The resulting jam was gritty and pale pink,
but I told my disappointed kids they could add more berries at home to save their jam.
Stoically they bottled the crunchy gloop and stuck on their homemade labels.
I enjoyed checking the labels before they left until I found one that said:
"Roses are red. Violets are blue.
I wouldn't eat this stuff if I were you! Happy Father's Day."
*
While having dinner one night, Milton Berle asked his wife for a glass of water.
"Milton," she replied, "just for tonight why don't you get it yourself?"
Berle, starting for the kitchen door, suddenly stopped and turned.
"Where," he asked, "do we keep the water?"
*
I don't mind the neighborhood children who write their names in the dust on
the back of my automobile, just as long as they don't include the date too.
*
A six-year-old comes crying to his mother because his little sister pulled his hair.
"Don't be angry," the mother says,
"Your little sister doesn't realize that pulling hair hurts."
A short while later, there's more crying, and the mother goes to investigate.
This time the sister is bawling and her brother says, "She knows now."
*
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars.
You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.
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