Down Hummingbird Lane

☺☺

 

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♥

 

The only one of your children...
who does not grow up and move away is
your husband.

 

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I took my wife to a wife-swapping party......
I had to throw in some cash.

 

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I don't use extra virgin olive oil cause I want
my food to have some experience.....

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Acid rain is total bullshit.
I stood in it for hours and didn't even hallucinate
one time.

 

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I need to find a better way to trick my dog into
taking his medication because the last 2 times
he tricked me into taking it ......

 

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I remember when I joined the Mile High Club.
I was flying solo at the time, but I think it still
counts.

 

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My doctor told me, "If you don't quit smoking,
it doesn't really matter how poorly you eat"
and that was the best day of my life.

 

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Combating Terrorism.....
A thought regarding the ISIS/ISIL thing.
Rather than explosives, carpet bomb them
with bacon, pork chops and the like.
Either they will flee or will succumb to the
aroma and become obese and diabetic.

 

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SALMON: Who has been spreading gossip
I thought I could trust you two.....
TROUT: I don't know, who could it be?!
BIG MOUTH BASS: Yeah, who??

 

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My wife is still mad at me for that 20 minute
blank stare I did when she asked me what I
was thankful for on Thanksgiving day.

 

 

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