••
♥
I accepted the Microsoft terms and conditions
without reading them, and apparently I’m now responsible
for hemming all of Bill Gates’ pants.
••
A baby shower invitation? Ha ha...
No thanks, I have a regular size shower that I can use
whenever I want.
No thanks, I have a regular size shower that I can use
whenever I want.
••
My memory has gotten so bad it has actually caused me to
lose my job.
I'm still employed..... I just can't remember where.
lose my job.
I'm still employed..... I just can't remember where.
••
If Princess Peach fixed shoes for a living she's be Princess
Peach Cobbler......
Peach Cobbler......
••
Wife: “If I die first, I want you to remarry.”
Me: “Wow. Do you really hate me that much?”
Me: “Wow. Do you really hate me that much?”
••
Answering Machine Message 143...
Hi, this is the answering machine. I am on strike.
Any messages you leave will be deleted.
Hi, this is the answering machine. I am on strike.
Any messages you leave will be deleted.
••
“It's the barbecue I've always wanted - the grill of my dreams!”
••
Commodities Market;
The price of a barrel of oil has just fallen to $45.
That's a really cheap price for oil.
That's even a really cheap price for barrels!
The price of a barrel of oil has just fallen to $45.
That's a really cheap price for oil.
That's even a really cheap price for barrels!
••
What’s the biggest crime committed by transvestites?
Male fraud.
Male fraud.
••
HIPPO: I'm really heavy....
ZIPPO: I'm a little lighter......
ZIPPO: I'm a little lighter......
••••
