Good Earth Day Morning....
We're gonna have a cool, wet day...
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Pete, you ready for some pizza....
It's got everything you like on it....
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Maybe in a cone shape??
Makes it easy to carry around....
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Hey, no breaking in the line...
get to the back of the line....
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I won't steal your Pizza again.....
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I can taste that chicken Pizza now!!
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Yeah...you like Pizza too...I know....
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No...and I don't like Tofu pizza, either!
Pete does...he eats any kind....
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You look like your scared as hick!!
That cat looks mean....
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He's bad...He's never had a great Pizza...
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Too much beer.....
Well, time to leave ya....
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♥♥♥
~~ Every time a bell rings, my dog goes into the Corner....
Is it because he's a boxer?
Is it because he's a boxer?
☼
~~ At a wedding my friend, a professional videographer,
was filming, the officiating minister had had difficulty
untying the wedding bands that had been secured to a
satin pillow with a small ribbon.
However, at the reception later that day, the minister
explained to the gathering, "Ladies and gentlemen,
to begin with, my job today was to tie the knot,
not to untie it."
was filming, the officiating minister had had difficulty
untying the wedding bands that had been secured to a
satin pillow with a small ribbon.
However, at the reception later that day, the minister
explained to the gathering, "Ladies and gentlemen,
to begin with, my job today was to tie the knot,
not to untie it."
☼
~~ It takes two to make a quarrel and three to make it
interesting.
interesting.
☼
~~ Not till I was a 38-year-old father of two did I finally
get my first pair of designer jeans--handed down to me by
my 16-year-old son, who'd outgrown them.
get my first pair of designer jeans--handed down to me by
my 16-year-old son, who'd outgrown them.
☼
~~ My husband, Julius, and I were about to become
first-time parents.
Just outside the delivery-room door, a nurse handed
Julius a hospital gown, cap and slippers, with instructions
to put them on before entering.
I was wheeled in.
The room was bustling with noise and activity, but within
a few minutes, silence descended as everyone began to
stare at something just above my head.
Then a murmur of whispers and giggles started to build.
As I struggled to turn to see what was happening,
the door suddenly burst open.
My doctor came flying into the room and landed on the
floor.
The room was instantly silent again.
The doctor picked himself up and demanded to know
what the pile of clothes was doing on the floor just outside
the door.
The staff burst out laughing.
I had finally managed to roll onto my side--and spotted
my husband, desperately trying to keep the back of his
hospital gown closed.
first-time parents.
Just outside the delivery-room door, a nurse handed
Julius a hospital gown, cap and slippers, with instructions
to put them on before entering.
I was wheeled in.
The room was bustling with noise and activity, but within
a few minutes, silence descended as everyone began to
stare at something just above my head.
Then a murmur of whispers and giggles started to build.
As I struggled to turn to see what was happening,
the door suddenly burst open.
My doctor came flying into the room and landed on the
floor.
The room was instantly silent again.
The doctor picked himself up and demanded to know
what the pile of clothes was doing on the floor just outside
the door.
The staff burst out laughing.
I had finally managed to roll onto my side--and spotted
my husband, desperately trying to keep the back of his
hospital gown closed.
☼
~~ My six-year-old daughter, Camilla, was thirsty and
asked her great-aunt, whom we were visiting in California,
if she could have a drink of water.
They walked over to the fridge, which had an ice-and-water
dispenser on the door, and as she filled a glass, my aunt
asked, "How do you like our fridge?"
Camilla looked at it closely and then said, "We have one
at home, too, but ours has food in it.
asked her great-aunt, whom we were visiting in California,
if she could have a drink of water.
They walked over to the fridge, which had an ice-and-water
dispenser on the door, and as she filled a glass, my aunt
asked, "How do you like our fridge?"
Camilla looked at it closely and then said, "We have one
at home, too, but ours has food in it.
☼
~~ Late one night in the Washington D.C., a mugger
wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a
well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs.
"Give me your money!" he demanded.
Indignant, the affluent man replied,
"You can't do this - I'm a US Congressman!"
"In that case," replied the robber,
"give me MY money!"
wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a
well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs.
"Give me your money!" he demanded.
Indignant, the affluent man replied,
"You can't do this - I'm a US Congressman!"
"In that case," replied the robber,
"give me MY money!"
☼
~~ One reason why a dog is such an endearing creature
is that his tail wags instead of his tongue.
is that his tail wags instead of his tongue.
☼
~~ A man was riding a bus, minding his own business,
when the gorgeous woman next to him started to
breastfeed her baby.
The baby wouldn't take it, so she said:
"Come on, eat it all up or I'll have to give it to this nice
man here."
Five minutes later, the baby was still not feeding,
so she said, "Come on, honey.
Take it or I'll give it to this nice man here."
A few minutes later, the anxious man blurted out,
"Come on, kid..... Make up your mind!
I was supposed to get off four stops ago!"
when the gorgeous woman next to him started to
breastfeed her baby.
The baby wouldn't take it, so she said:
"Come on, eat it all up or I'll have to give it to this nice
man here."
Five minutes later, the baby was still not feeding,
so she said, "Come on, honey.
Take it or I'll give it to this nice man here."
A few minutes later, the anxious man blurted out,
"Come on, kid..... Make up your mind!
I was supposed to get off four stops ago!"
☼
~~ "A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has
cheated some woman out of a divorce."
cheated some woman out of a divorce."
☼
~~ Verne was teeing off from the mens' tee.
On his downswing, he realized that his wife, Joy, was
teeing up on the woman's tee directly in front of him.
Unable to stop his swing, he nailed it, and hit her directly
in the temple, killing her instantly.
A few days later, Verne got a call from the coroner
regarding her autopsy.
Coroner : "Verne, your wife seemed to have died from
blunt force trauma to the head.
You said you hit a golf ball and hit her in the temple,
is that correct?"
Verne : "Yes, sir, that's correct.."
Coroner : "Well, inexplicably I found a golf ball wedged
up her butt."
Verne : "Was it a Wilson 3?"
Coroner : "Yes, it was."
Verne : "That was my mulligan."
On his downswing, he realized that his wife, Joy, was
teeing up on the woman's tee directly in front of him.
Unable to stop his swing, he nailed it, and hit her directly
in the temple, killing her instantly.
A few days later, Verne got a call from the coroner
regarding her autopsy.
Coroner : "Verne, your wife seemed to have died from
blunt force trauma to the head.
You said you hit a golf ball and hit her in the temple,
is that correct?"
Verne : "Yes, sir, that's correct.."
Coroner : "Well, inexplicably I found a golf ball wedged
up her butt."
Verne : "Was it a Wilson 3?"
Coroner : "Yes, it was."
Verne : "That was my mulligan."
☼
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Todays Thought: Motivation is what gets you started.
Habit is what keeps you going
Habit is what keeps you going
Rae's trivia....A father Emperor penguin withstands the Antarctic cold
for 60 days or more to protect his eggs, which he keeps
on his feet, covered with a feathered flap.
During this entire time he doesn't eat a thing.
Most father penguins lose about 25 pounds while they
wait for their babies to hatch.
Afterward, they feed the chicks a special liquid from their
throats.
When the mother penguins return to care for the young,
the fathers go to sea to eat and rest.
for 60 days or more to protect his eggs, which he keeps
on his feet, covered with a feathered flap.
During this entire time he doesn't eat a thing.
Most father penguins lose about 25 pounds while they
wait for their babies to hatch.
Afterward, they feed the chicks a special liquid from their
throats.
When the mother penguins return to care for the young,
the fathers go to sea to eat and rest.
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