Happy Valentines Day!

Good Morning....

Ready for a warm week?

Gonna be windy today...

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Go easy on the chocolates....

You know whom I'm speaking about.....

The chocolate lovers......

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First thing in the Morning??

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Oh, No....not that!....

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Yep, I smelled it.....

Made nose wrinkle.....

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He's sneaky....

He knows when to do it, so he won't get the blame...

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Oh, My GOD....I'm dying here!!

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Just what they all need....

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I wouldn't do that if I were you.....

Doesn't look safe....

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I don't know about this.......

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What can I say.......

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That bike is hauling alot of weight.....

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I don't know if I want a ride in that??

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♥♥♥

~~ you are a short timer when You wake up hung over in jail..      You have a black eye and bloody knuckles..          Last night was the company Christmas party.

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~~ boss was into motivation once he posted a sign which
read...
"Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday."
I added: "And now you know why too".

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~~ yesterday.... I came upon this pretty new temp standing
in front of the paper shredder with a confused look on her
face.
I asked if she needed any help and she said,
"Yeah, how does this thing work ?"
I took the papers from her hand and demonstrated how to work the shredder.
She stood there a moment with yet another confused
expression, so I said, "Any questions ?"
She said, "Yeah, exactly where do the copies come out ?"
Now I'm looking for a new job..
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~~ A guy wuz trying to buy a health insurance policy.
The insurance agent was going down the list of standard
questions.
"Ever have an accident?"
"Nope, nary a one."
"None? You've never had any accidents."
"Nope. Ain't never had one. Never."
"Well, you said on this form you were bit by a snake.
Wouldn't you consider that an accident?"
"Hell, no. That joker bit me on purpose."

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~~ Late on night in the Washington D.C., a mugger wearing
a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and
stuck a gun in his ribs.
"Give me your money!" he demanded.
Indignant, the affluent man replied, "You can't do this -
I'm a US Congressman!"
"In that case," replied the robber, "give me MY money!"

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~~ A good education story....
A former Sergeant, having served his time with the Marine
Corps, took a new job as a school teacher, but just before
the school year started he injured his back.
He was required to wear a plaster cast around the upper
part of his body.
Fortunately, the cast fit under his shirt and wasn't noticeable.
On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to the
toughest students in the school.
The smart Aleck punks, having already heard the new teacher
was a former Marine, were leery of him and decided to see
how tough he really was, before trying any pranks.
Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, the new
teacher opened the window wide and sat down at his desk.
When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he picked up a
stapler and promptly stapled the tie to his chest.
Dead silence... He had no trouble with discipline that year.

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~~ what's the black stuff between elephants toes?
slow natives

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~~ An irate woman burst into the baker's shop and said,
"I sent my son in for two pounds of cookies this morning,
but when I weighed them there was only one pound.
I suggest that you check your scales."
The baker looked at her calmly for a moment or two and then replied,
"Ma'am, I suggest you weigh your son."

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~~ Why are New Yorkers so grouchy all the time?
Because the light at the end of their tunnel is New Jersey.

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~~ you are a short timer when....
You wake up hung over in jail.
You have a black eye and bloody knuckles.
Last night was the company Christmas party.

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~~ I was depressed, Doctor, so I tried to kill myself by
taking 1,000 aspirin.
What happened?
Well, after the first two I felt better.


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Todays Thought;  "Our life is what our thoughts make it."


Rae's Trivia... What made the hatter mad?     More than 100 years ago, the felt hat makers of England
used mercury to stabilize wool.     Most of them eventually became poisoned by the fumes,
as demonstrated by the Mad Hatter in Lewis Carroll's  Alice in Wonderland.
Breathing mercury's fumes over a long period of time will cause erethism, a disorder characterized by nervousness, irritability, and strange personality changes.