Good Morning, Friends and neighbors.....
The storm is moving south of us...big snow storm..
they are calling for 2+ snow for us.., later in the evening.
Arty is itching to use that new snowblower....
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Want some breakfast....Petewete??
This is diet food??
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These people must be retired??
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What can I say..??
But I did hear the north pole is moving?
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Skippy....get your butt home !!!
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Somethin an't right??
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Now you know why I had to get a new one.....
You heard of keeping up with the Jones??
Well I had to keep up with Petewete....
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Now a couple of toons this morning......
Looks like Eno's gonna get cabin fever....
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A pretty blue rose.....
The red ones are for lovers....
What's the blue one for??
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OMG...I've gotta leave on this one......
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♥♥♥
~~ It was so cold in DC today . . .
Nancy Pelosi had her hands in her own pockets.
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~~ An old grandmother brought her grandchild to a karate
competition.
Noting that the organiser seemed understaffed she
approached the table.
"Good morning," she said to the Director, "you look a little
shorthanded.
Anything I can do to help?"
"Well yes, we are short of fighters for the under 90 kg division,"
the director replied. "Sorry," the grandmother said,
"I don't know anything about karate."
"That's OK" said the director.
"We need referees, too."
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~~ One summer day in 1986, the Russian journalist
Nicholas Daniloff was speaking on the telephone with
his wife.
As the conversation turned to domestic concerns,
suddenly the line went dead.
Daniloff's wife, apparently,
had said something which prompted eavesdropping
agents to cut her off.
Her suspicious remark? "Zeus has fleas."
Zeus was the family dog. Daniloff was accused of
espionage, arrested, and later released
(in September, 1986).
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~~ I finally got my boss to laugh out loud.
Did you tell him a joke?
No, I asked for a raise!
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~~ The ferry of which I was captain was docking and
there was a slight off-shore wind.
Normally we wouldn't need a bow line - engine thrust
would keep the ship steady...but I took no chances,
and instructed the young helmsman to run down and
get the head line.
When he hesitated, I repeated my request.
Some time passed and I was wondering what was keeping
him when he reappeared.
"Beats me why you want this, Captain," he said.
And he handed me the headlines from that morning's
newspaper.
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~~ Son: "Dad what's the difference between confident and
confidential?"
Dad: "Hmmm...You are my son.
Of that I am confident.
Your friend Timmy is also my son....... That's confidential."
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~~ Fresh out of gift ideas, a man buys his mother-in-law
a large plot in an expensive cemetery.
On her next birthday, he buys her nothing,
so she phones him, furious.
"What are you complaining about?" he fires back.
"You still haven't used the present I gave you last year."
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~~ A few of my ten-year-old daughter Debra’s school friends
developed a mysterious rash, and as the week progressed,
more and more friends got it,
until it became almost a status symbol.
Then one day Debra arrived home very excited because she,
too, had “The Rash” on her arm.
I asked to see it, and after close inspection told her I didn’t
see a thing.
“Yes,” she replied ecstatically, “that’s the way it starts!”
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~~ I had an elderly lady in the ER one night and had to give
her some meds.
Her mouth was very dry, so I sat her up in bed and with a cup
of water in my hand and said, "Ms Smith, lets wet your whistle first.
" She sipped the water, and I placed the pills in her mouth.
She didn't swallow, just kept rolling the pills around in her mouth.
I said, " Ms Smith, are you having trouble swallowing the pills?"
She replied, "No...I can't whistle!"
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~~ 7-Eleven is about to start selling their own brand of wine.
Is that new?
They had 7-eleven wine when I was in high school.
We called it Robitussin.
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