Hey, we are getting some nice warm rain this morning...
Good morning everyone, we needed this rain....
☼
I don't know if he's going to wrestle her or milk her....
☼
To late....she's riding away.....
☼
Weird....we are weird.....
and alot of trouble....
☼
I'll never tell.....Bubba..
☼
I don't know about that....
My kitty's cuter....
☼
I don't know either.....
☼
Now thats a long cat....
☼
I don't think you should have parked there....
☼
Lets have a "Coke".....
☼
I bet this would be hell driving, especially taking a curve...
☼
We gonna do it...
Our country needs us....
☼
☼
♥♥♥
~~ I used to live on the main floor of an old Victorian farmhouse .
Upstairs there was another apartment, where my neighbour Ivan lived.
As my first winter in the farmhouse approached,
I realized that the thermostat to control the furnace was in
my apartment.
I told Ivan to just knock on his floor if he was cold,
and I'd be happy to turn up the heat.
One cold day, I heard knocking on my ceiling,
so I turned up the thermostat.
Ten minutes later Ivan knocked again, so I turned it up some
more.
Another five minutes later, I heard pounding.
By that point I was roasting, so I threw on my coat,
went outside and knocked on Ivan's door.
"Yes Ivan answered.
"Is there a problem with the heat up here," I asked,
"because you keep knocking."
Looking at the mallet in his hand he replied,
"I'm just tenderizing my meat."
☼
~~ A pleasing personality helps you master the major
cause of failure--the inability to get along with people
harmoniously.
☼
~~ One for Rae....
The convent had been presented with a new car,
a red Mini Metro, the pride of its breed.
Sister Lourdes, the only qualified driver, became the chauffer
for all and sundry.
Every Saturday she would drive Reverend Mother into town for
the shopping.
All went well until Bank Holiday weekend when the town was
so packed with people and cars that is became evident that
there was no earthly place to park.
"Don't worry, Reverend Mother," said Sister Lourdes.
"You go into the supermarket and I'll drive around the block
until you come out."
Off sped the car, and the Reverend Mother bustled around
the store shopping quickly, then rushing back to the curbside.
There she stood for five minutes, ten, twenty.
No sign of Sister Lourdes.
Where could she be?
Eventually the Reverend Mother approached a patrolling
policeman.
"Excuse me, Officer," said she, Have you seen a nun in a
red mini?"
"No," replied the officer, "but these days nothing would
surprise me!"
☼
~~ The autumn leaves are a lot like raising kids.
First they turn on you, and then they fly away.
And next thing you know, you look out the window and they're
back!
☼
~~ "I've often thought that the process of aging could be
slowed down if it had to go through Congress."
(George H. W. Bush)
☼
~~ An old man saw a very tired infantryman resting after a
hard foot march.
The man said with disdain: "When I was of your age I thought
nothing of a ten-mile hike."
"Well, I don't think much of it either," replied the GI.
☼
~~ The U.S. Bureau of Internal Revenue astounded
Al Capone by demanding millions of dollars in back taxes.
"They can't collect legal taxes from illegal money,"
he objected.
(They could; in 1931 Capone was imprisoned for tax evasion.)
☼
~~ Maurice Chevalier was once asked why he had elected
to remain a bachelor.
"You're not going to believe this," he replied,
"but it's for a very good reason.
When I get up in the morning, I like to have the choice of
getting out of bed from either side."
☼
~~ When my husband was away at basic training,
my four-year-old daughter and I stayed with my sister.
Since my daughtrer already called me Mommy,
she started calling her aunt Mom - the way her six-year-old
cousin did.
One day, someone called.
I picked up the extension and overheard the person ask my
daughter if her daddy was home.
She said, "No, he's in the army."
"Is your mom home? he asked.
Yes, but she's asleep with Uncle Danny.
☼
~~ I was talking to Thomas, my three-year-old grandson,
on the phone the evening before my trip to Calgary to visit his
family. "Are you driving here? he asked me.
"No," I said. "I'm driving to an airport near my house
parking my car and taking an airplane to an airport near your
house.
"When I arrive at that airport, do you think you can come and
pick me up?!"
Thomas replied: "I think you might be too heavy."
☼
~~ Dean Martin was good at cards and worked as a
professional dealer [and gambler].
But he wasn't good at math.
He promised 10 percent of his earnings to his first band leader,
10 percent to MCA, 35 percent to a guy who loaned him cash,
20 percent to another guy who loaned him funds,
20 percent to comedian Lou Costello, 10 percent to a radio
programmer, and 5 percent to a New York club owner.
By 1946, Dean had given away 110 percent of his earnings.
He declared himself bankrupt.
☼
☼
Todays Thought: "The superior man is modest in his speech, but exceeds in his actions." - Confucius
Coffee, Pete?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3 comments:
Yep, thanks..Coffee's good too....Pete
That truck wouldnt be allowed to drive like that in Canada!!:)
Ha ha ha, red mini!!! I usually say 'Hail Mary full of Grace, help me find a parking space' often works ;-)
Rae x
Post a Comment