Good Morning......Friends and Neighbors....
Gonna be a nice day....
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A nice sunrise this morning.......
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Ma Ma lookin for some breakfast.....
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You did it....left them feathers all over.......
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Yep...I beat you~ wanna go again?
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Your just lazy......
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Let me in......NOW!
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Need a drink of water??
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She looks mean....
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I guess he can't read........
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New movie? new 007?
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Yep...sent your money in......ha-ha
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~~ Pat: Tommy, I wish you'd stop reaching for things at the dinner table.
Haven't you got a tongue?"
Tommy: Sure, Mom, but my arm's longer.
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~~ Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished
by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.
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~~ My cousin Marion and the church organist were discussing music for Marion's wedding service.
A first-time bride at 30, she said she'd like a song from Fiddler on the Roof.
"You mean Sunrise, Sunset?" the organist asked.
"Actually," Marion replied," I was thinking of 'Miracle of Miracles."
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~~ A man had just presented his wife with the fox coat she had been coaxing and cajoling him to by her for weeks.
Now he was perplexed to see her examining it with a sad look.
“What’s the matter, sweetheart? Don’t you like the coat?” he asked.
“I love it,” she answered.
“It’s just that I was feeling sorry for the poor little creature who was skinned alive so that I could have the pleasure of wearing this coat.”
“Why, thank you,” said the husband.
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~~ Mother: "I'm afraid our son has decided to take upacting."
Father: "What's so bad about that?"
Mother: "Well, he's gotten so big that whenever he appears in a play, he crashes right through the floor."
Father: "Don't worry about it. It's a stage he's going through..."
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~~ Showing his friend around his his home,
Walt pointed out all of the collectibles he and his wife had acquired over their long years of marriage.
"The day before I die, I'd like to sell every piece we've got just to see how much it's all worth."
"Well," his friend replies, "since you couldn't possibly know the day before you were going to die, you'll never be able to sell!"
"And that's where you're wrong," the man smiled.
"If I sell it, my wife would kill me!"
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~~ Q. What do you call two young married spiders?
A. Newly webs.
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~~ For three years, the young attorney had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn.
The last time he'd finally managed an affair with the innkeeper's daughter.
Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short.
There sat his lover with an infant in her lap!
"Helen, why didn't you write when you learned you were pregnant?" he cried.
"I would have rushed up here, we could have gotten married, and the baby would have my name!"
"Well," she said, "when my folks found out about my condition, we sat up all night talkin' and talkin' and decided it would be better to have a bastard in the family than a lawyer!"
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~~ "A Jewish woman had 2 chickens.
One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the
other one to help the sick one get well." (Henny Youngman)
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~~ My three-year-old cousin scared us one summer by disappearing during our lakeside vacation.
More than a dozen relatives searched the forest and shoreline, and everyone was relieved when we found Martin playing calmly in the woods.
"Listen to me, Martin," his mother said sharply.
"From now on when you want to go someplace, you tell Mommy first, okay?"
Martin thought about that for a moment and said, "Okay...... Disney World."
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~~ My first day at a resort I decided to hit the beach.
When I went back to our room to get something to drink, one of the hotel maids was making my bed.
I grabbed my cooler and was on my way out when I paused and asked, "Can we drink beer on the beach?"
"Sure," she said, "but I have to finish the rest of the rooms first."
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Todays thought; Your dog will always crap near your favorite garden seat.
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