Have not seen any rain yet...but it is warm.....
Dumb spammers still trying....ha-ha....
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Any one for some "Gater bread"? Would make a great sub.....
maybe some ham and cheese....
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This gater wants some.....
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I guess she wants to taste it also.....?
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Their looking at the menu, for breakfast.....
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He's watching TV and chillin out.....
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I still think you got my burger.....
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Shes carrying her hundreds of baby's on her back....
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Charge!!
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You got it.....
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Well, time to get out of here........what a ride!!
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♥♥♥
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~~ What is silent and smells like worms?
Bird Pharts!!
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~~ I went down this morning to sign up my Dog for welfare.
At first the lady said Dogs are not eligible to draw welfare.
So I explained to her that my Dog is unemployed, lazy,
can't speak English and has no clue who his Daddy is.
So she looked in her policy book to see what it takes to qualify.
My Dog gets his first check Friday.
Is this a great country or what?
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~~ On her forty-first birthday, a woman received, among other
presents, an extravagantly expensive wrinkle-removing cream
from her teenage daughter.
"And what did she give you last year?" a guest asked the mom.
Her reply without hesitation was: "The wrinkles!"
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~~ Adam was the perfect figure of a man,
and Eve was indescribably beautiful.
So where do all the ugly people come from?
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~~ Eve, in the Garden of Eden, said, "God, I have a problem.
It's a beautiful garden, but I'm lonely and I'm sick of eating apples."
"Okay," God said. "I'll create a man for you."
Eve said, "What's a man?"
"He's a creature with aggressive tendencies and an enormous ego who
doesn't listen and gets lost a lot, but he's big and strong, he can open
jars and hunt animals, and he's fun in bed."
"Sound great!" said Eve
"There's just one other thing.
He's going to want to believe I made him first."
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~~ When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport;
when a tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity.
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~~ Two police officers saw an old woman staggering out a local bar,
stopping her they can tell she has had far too much to drink and instead
of taking her to jail they decide to just drive her home.
They loaded her into the police cruiser one of the officers gets in the
back with the drunk woman.
As they drove through the streets they kept asking the old woman
where she lived, all the old lady would say as she stroked the officers
arm is, “You’re Passionate.”
They drove awhile longer and asked again, but again the same response
as she stroked his arm, “You’re Passionate.”
The officers were getting a little upset so they stopped the car and said
to the woman, “Look we have driven around this city for two hours and
you still haven’t told us where you live!”
She replied, “I keep trying to tell you, you’re passin it!”
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~~ Q: Do you know how to make ice water?
A: Take an onion and a knife, cut the onion and your ice water!
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~~ Business one-liners
A President of a democracy is a man who is always ready,
willing, and able to lay down your life for his country.
A backscratcher will always find new itches;
a brown-noser will always find new sense.
A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work.
A bird in the bush usually has a friend in there with him.
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~~ A good friend of mine warned me that, as my three daughters
became old enough to date, I'd disapprove of every young man who
took them out.
But when the time came, I was pleased that my friend's prediction was
wrong.
Each boy was pleasant and well mannered.
Talking to one of my daughters one day, I said that I liked all the young
men she and her sisters brought home.
"You know, Dad," she replied, "we don't show you everybody."
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~~ The lady answered the phone and it was her daughter.
"What do you want?
You are supposed to be at the hardware store with your Dad?"
"WE're in jail" answered the daughter tearfully.
"What!!! What are you doing in jail?" asked her mother.
"Its all Dads fault" she wailed," he told me to go find a Black & Decker!"
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~~ A single guy was getting irritated because his friends preferred to
hang out with their new kids rather than with him.
"Where's the loyalty?" he protested.
"I've known you for twenty-five years.
How long have you known your baby?....... A month."
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Todays Thought: "Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination."
(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)¤(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)(ºOº)
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