.
How about a nice bacon sandwich for breakfast?
.
Or maybe some KFC... can't make up my mind.....
.
Not thats bad...
.
Oh....My......
.
Friends....
.
Get lots of fish??
.
Got to get them some reading materials.. Right?
.
What can i say??
.
Well, I'm loaded up and on my way......
.
♥♥♥
~~ Like all growing boys, my teenage grandson was constantly hungry,
I went to the refrigerator to find something he might like. After poking around a bit and moving the milk and juice cartons,
I spotted a bowl of leftover chili.
I called out to him excitedly.
He came running into the kitchen.
"Look! I found some chili."
Struggling to be polite, he said, "If you're that surprised,
I'm not really sure I want it."
.
~~ A man's neighbor was complaining about the weather.
He went on and on, saying "It snowed, then it rained,
and now it's cloudy and damp."
The man had heard enough and said,
"We could take a lesson from the weather.
It doesn't care what you or anybody else thinks of it!"
.
~~ QUESTION: Why does it take longer to build a blonde
snowman than a regular one?
ANSWER: You have to hollow out the head.
.
~~ A woman was on trial for killing her husband.
All the jurors but one voted to convict her.
The one juror was so determined that the woman should be
found innocent that she eventually was able to change the mind
of all the others, and they all voted "not guilty."
Afterwards, the juror who had held out for the innocent vote
was questioned by reporters, who asked her how she could
have been so certain the woman on trial was innocent.
She replied, "Well, I don't know.
I guess I just felt sorry for her......
After all, she is a widow."
.
~~ If a good friend tells you something that you really don't
want to hear, there's a good chance that it is the truth.
.
~~ My friend from Iowa wrote:
It's winter in Iowa And the gentle breezes blow,
70 miles per hour at 25 below!
Oh, how I love Iowa When the snow's up to your butt;
You take a breath of winter air And your nose is frozen shut
Yes, the weather here is wonderful, I guess I'll hang around.
I could never leave Iowa , 'Cause I'm frozen to the ground.
.
~~ Why do people think that swaying their arm back and forth
would change the direction of a bowling ball?
.
~~ Visiting a college campus, the prospective student spots a
building called Hemingway Hall.
"That's nice," he says, "a building named for Ernest Hemingway."
"Actually," says the tour guide, "it's named for Joshua Hemingway."
"Was he a writer?" the student asks.
"Yes. He wrote a big check."
.
~~ QUESTION: What do you get if cross a snowman and a shark?
ANSWER: Frost bite.......
.
.
Todays thought : "Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer
but wish we didn't."
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