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Nice picture....
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Watch out!...don't get near them......
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Get out of the window...Dummy!!
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Now this is a big Joker.....I would not get in the ring....
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Too, many!..FATTY!!
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You better turn off..Theys will find out....
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Sorry bout that...wrong gear.. I wanted to go forward....
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Who needs a truck??
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Nice Door....Bubba...when will you paint it??
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♥♥♥
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~~ Children who never come when called will grow up to be
doctors.
Children who come before they are called will grow up to be
lawyers.
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~~ Faith picked up her eight-year-old daughter Colleen after
school and asked, "What exciting things did you do in school
today?"
"Well, in art class I made a sign for my bedroom door,"
Colleen replied.
Turning to her three-year-old sister Cadie, who was sitting in
her car seat, Colleen said, "It says 'No little kids allowed.'"
Cadie responded, "I can't read, so I can still come in your room."
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~~ It’s not your salary that makes you rich, it’s your spending
habits.
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~~ "Can anyone tell me," asked the teacher,
"why the Middle Ages are often called the Dark Ages?"
Bobbie raised her hand and shouted,
"Because they had so many knights?"
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~~ The company where I work provides four-foot-high cubicles
so each employee can have some privacy.
One day a co-worker had an exasperating phone conversation
with one of her teenage sons.
After hanging up, she heaved a sigh and said,
"No one ever listens to me."
Immediately, several voices from surrounding cubicles called out,
"Yes, we do."
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~~ A football player sat beside a boy in class that was really
smart and the teacher knew that he was cheating,
but she just couldn't catch him.
One day she was grading a test and she noticed that the
smart boy had written "I don't know the answer" on number 10.
So she looked at the jock's paper and smiled.
He had finally given himself away.
His answer looked like this:
10. me neither....
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~~ A second-grade math class that was learning about groups.
In one exercise, pupils were asked to label a group of items
according to their common characteristics.
Pictured were onion rings, doughnuts, a bundt cake and
ring cookies.
The correct answer would have been that all the items have
holes in the center.
But one health-conscious boy's response was,
"All of those things contain too much cholesterol."
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~~ Annie, an elderly Scots lady, lay dying.
She looked up and asked her husband if he would do her just
one small favor before she went.
'Fergus,' she asked, 'on the day o' the funeral I'd like ye tae ride
in the same coach as ma mother.'
To which Fergus replied, 'A' richt, Annie.
I'll dae that tae please ye.... But ye've completely spoilt the
day for me.'
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~~ A sweater is usually put on a child when the parent feels chilly.
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~~ On a crisp fall afternoon, my four-year-old son was helping
rake leaves in the front yard of our farmhouse.
I glanced up just in time to see a flock of geese flying over
and pointed out how they flew in a formation shaped like a V.
He patiently watched them as they disappeared over the
horizon and then turning to me and asked,
"Do they know any other letters?"
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~~ Our eleven-year-old twin grandsons, Martin and Christopher,
spend a lot of time golfing with their parents.
I realized how much time one day as we began a meal.
We always say this grace:
"For food and friends and all God sends, we give Him a grateful
thanks."
That day I began "For…," and waited for the boys to join in.
When they kept talking, I repeated more loudly, "Foooor…."
Martin looked up and said, "Look out, God, there’s a prayer
coming!"
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~~ It is amazing how nice people are to you when they know
you’re going away.
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~~ Some things are just meant to go together: love and marriage,
mom and apple pie, baseball and hot dogs, joy and happiness,
grace and peace, mercy and forgiveness.
These are but a few of the Siamese twins of rightness.
Other things just don't mix well: oil and water, cats and dogs,
frogs and little girls, hate and love, rain and drought,
war and peace, grace and hatred, honor and a fool.
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~~ For Christmas, I gave my kid a BB gun.
He gave me a sweater with a bull’s-eye on the back.
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Todays Thought: You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose,
but you can not pick your friends nose...
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