Down Hummingbird Lane

Good Morning...Readers.....We're having a good Morning here......
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Another foggy sunrise....... We've been having a storm in the evenings
and it makes for a foggy morning......
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It's called "Mutton busting"......

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Damn....from a Kantucky fried Chicken to a Chiropactors office....

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Ugly looking dog.....

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Yep.......

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Looking for breakfast...are ya??

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Easy there.........

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Fight...fight...................................

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Yep....that'll do it every time.........

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♥♥♥

~~~ HEALTH FOOD;
2000 B.C. – Here, eat this root.....
1000 A.D. – That root is heathen...... Here, say this prayer.
1850 A.D. – That prayer is superstition...... Here, drink this potion.
1940 A.D. – That potion is snake oil.... Here, swallow this pill.
1985 A.D. – That pill is ineffective..... Here, take this antibiotic.
2009 A.D. – That antibiotic doesn’t work anymore.....Here, eat this root.

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~~~ Grandpa is a late convert to the technological age.
The other day, he called my father to complain that he couldn't use his printer:
"The screen says 'Warming Up."
"Dad ran over there, only to find half the printer melted.
"What happened?" he asked.
"I don't know," said Grandpa...... "But even the space heater didn't help."

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~~~ "The perils of duck hunting are great...especially for the duck."

(Walter Cronkite...1916--2009)

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~~~ On Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the expenses of the new carpet.
All those wishing to do something on the new carpet, please come forward and get a piece of paper at the end of the service.

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~~~ "Father giving advice to son: Never do anything once around the house that you don't want to do for the rest of your life."

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~~~ My five-year-old nephew came running into the house, crying and shaking his right hand. Sobbing, he told me he had been bouncing the basketball and it had bounced into the end of his fingers.
From the way he was crying, I knew he just needed a kiss-it- better cure.
His crying subsided and as he turned to go back outside, he said absently, "...or was it this hand?"

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~~~ TACT: The art of getting your point across without stabbing someone with it.

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~~~ Despite the fact that my in-laws had little interest in sports, we were watching a football game on television.
The field was white and it was still snowing.
My father-in-law wondered how they could play in such weather, and I answered that sometimes it added to the game to play under those conditions.
Then my mother- in-law asked, "Doesn't it make it difficult to slide into home plate?"

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~~~ Before I started Posting here, I drank, smoked, and used bad language.
Thanks to this job, I now have good reason.

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~~~ Recently, our town received a grant to build housing for midgets.
According to our demographics, they figured that we should have six midgets living here.
They sent enough money so that we could finance the building of homes and let the "little people" pay less than the going rate for rent.
Since we have only one "little person" living here it turns out that he won't have to pay anything for the only house we built, the subsidy covers everything.
We call it a "Stay Free Mini Pad."

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~~~ STATE OF THE ART: Anything that you can’t afford.

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~~~ My friend Billy's cat, Sam, loved riding in Billy's car, and it was always a battle if the animal was outside and he wanted to leave it at home.
One day Billy left Sam on the front steps and got into his car.
He was on the highway when suddenly he had to slam on the brakes to avoid the car ahead, and a screaming ball of fur slid down the front windshield.
Afterwards, Sam travelled everywhere with Billy.

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~~~ Short guys are always saying stupid things to me because I'm so tall.
One guy asked, "Do you play basketball?"
I said, "No, do you play miniature golf?"
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Todays Thought: Kids never change.
First they won't hang up their clothes, then they won't hang up the phone.
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