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An't I cute......Alison?....
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Let's all dance........
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♥♥♥
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~~~ Gus,..... on how he's spending his retirement:
"I ain't doing a damn thing, and I don't start until noon."
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~~~ This teenager was in a boutique for at least an hour choosing the perfect dress for a party. But the next day, she was back with the outfit.
"Can I exchange this for something else?" she asked.
I was surprised, but I couldn't argue with her explanation: "My parents like it."
"Can I exchange this for something else?" she asked.
I was surprised, but I couldn't argue with her explanation: "My parents like it."
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~~~ Bobbie said, "Whatcha doin today?"
I said, "Nothing."
She said, "You did that yesterday."
I said, "I wasn't finished."
I said, "I wasn't finished."
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~~~ One old man was sitting on a park bench talking to a new acquaintance.
"I'll tell you," he said, "I've learned that arthritis is the cruelest disease."
"Crueler than cancer?" his friend asked.
"You bet," the first codger replied.
"I'll tell you," he said, "I've learned that arthritis is the cruelest disease."
"Crueler than cancer?" his friend asked.
"You bet," the first codger replied.
"It makes every single one of your joints stiff, except the right one."
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~~~ reasons to sign off ......
A friend calls and says "How are you? Your phones have been busy " -- for a year!!!!!
You forgot how to work the TV remote control.
You see something funny and scream, "LOL, LOL."
You meet the mailman at the curb and swear he said ;YOU'VE GOT MAIL
You sign off and your screen says you were on for 3 days and 45 minutes.
You buy a laptop and a cell phone so you can have AOL in your car.
Tech support calls YOU for help.
You get a second phone line just to call out for pizza.
You purchase a vanity car license plate with your screen name on it.
You say "SCROLL UP" when someone asks what it was you said.
You sneak away to your computer when everyone goes to sleep.
You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
You end your sentences with.....three or more periods.......
Being called a "newbie" is a major insult to you.
Your teacher or boss recommends a drug test for the blood shot eyes.
You forgot how to work the TV remote control.
You see something funny and scream, "LOL, LOL."
You meet the mailman at the curb and swear he said ;YOU'VE GOT MAIL
You sign off and your screen says you were on for 3 days and 45 minutes.
You buy a laptop and a cell phone so you can have AOL in your car.
Tech support calls YOU for help.
You get a second phone line just to call out for pizza.
You purchase a vanity car license plate with your screen name on it.
You say "SCROLL UP" when someone asks what it was you said.
You sneak away to your computer when everyone goes to sleep.
You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
You end your sentences with.....three or more periods.......
Being called a "newbie" is a major insult to you.
Your teacher or boss recommends a drug test for the blood shot eyes.
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~~~ Sherry said....Purely by coincidence, I ran into my husband in our local grocery store on Valentine's Day.
Mark was carrying a beautiful pink azalea, and I joked, "That better be for me."
From behind, a woman's voice: "It is now."
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~~~ A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.
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~~~ Sally and Esther are sitting on the porch of their Miami Beach hotel.
"Oh my God!", cries Sally".
"Oh my God!", cries Sally".
"Look at that poor boy! Such a weak chin. "
"His mouth is crooked. "
"And look, his eyes are crossed."
"That boy," says Esther, "happens to be my son."
"Oh," replies Sally."
"That boy," says Esther, "happens to be my son."
"Oh," replies Sally."
"On him it's very becoming."
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Todays thought: "Those who race through life finish first."
1 comment:
Oh dear I'd better sign off, all of these were ringing bells lol
Rae x
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