Monday, March 16, 2015

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The king of Belgium is fed up that the Dutch make jokes about 
how dumb Belgians are. 
He goes to King Willem, of the Netherlands, and demands that 
the Dutch should do something stupid, so that the Belgians 
can laugh at the Dutch. 
Willem wants to maintain good relations so he says; "meh, 
we will build a bridge in the Sahara". 
The king of Belgium approves and so it happens; the Dutch 
build a bridge in the desert. 
They became the laughing stock of the world. 
The king of Belgium is pleased and says to king Willem:"
Ha ha that was funny, you can remove the bridge.
King Willem responds: "We can't, there are Belgians on the 
bridge trying to fish."

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Expert legal advice; next time you get arrested for drug 
possession just tell the judge they are not illegal drugs. 
They are undocumented pharmaceuticals. 
It works for Mexicans, etc! 

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The best way to keep 
your kids at home is to make the home a pleasant atmosphere....
you can also let the air out of their tires. 

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Learned the word “avocado” actually comes from the Aztec 
word for “testicle.” 
I'm thinking whoever invented smashed guacamole had some 
anger issues with men.

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Considering the amount of things that fall on their journey 
from my fork to my mouth, a majority of things that I eat can 
be considered “finger foods.”

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Question by a student !!
If a single teacher can’t teach us all the subjects, Then…
How could you expect a single student to learn all subjects ?

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When I was eight years old, I had to do a science 
project, but my dad just did it for me. 
I didn't contribute at all. 
I think the teacher kind of figured it out when the 
project was called, 
Is My Wife Cheating on Me? 

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Most times I take up exercising I meet new people. 
They're usually paramedics, but still, new people.

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Scientists are dumb. A meteor didn't kill the 
dinosaurs. 
I've been to the museum. 
It's obvious they starved to death.  

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My doctor said I shouldn't hug people, admittedly 
it was 10 years ago when I had the flu but I still 
use that one. 

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When an old lady dies and then her husband dies 
a couple of weeks later, it isn't because his heart 
is broken. 
It's because he can't cook. 

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