Good Morning....Great Morning.....everybody......
Calling for very good weather....(Glad you did Okay, "Snowman".
.

I don't wanna get close enought to find out........
.

Well, now he's happy, he's nowere close to were the Bear's at.....

.

He will just drink his beer, and not worry about the bear......

.

I couldn't drink, for thinking were it came from....

.

I used to have hair like that, and yes...I did use "Brylcreem"....

.

Thereby hangs a tail: Lion cubs are fascinated by the swishing tails of older

relatives, even taking an occasional bite

.

$25 million clock apartment. Wow, just wow..

.

Got any mice......She's hungry........

.

Eno's going riding in style.......

.

♥♥♥

~~~ A certain workman, notorious for his sponging proclivities, met a friend
one morning, and opened the conversation by saying:"
Can ye len' us a match, ....John?"
John having supplied him with the match, the first speaker began to feel his
pockets ostentatiously, and then remarked dolefully, "Man, I seem to have
left my tobacco pouch at hame."
John, however, was equal to the occasion, and holding out his hand, remarked:
"Aweel, ye'll no be needin' that match then."

.
~~~ Nearing the end, Paul is surrounded by his loved ones.
As the final moment approaches, he whispers, "I must tell you my greatest
secret.
"His family urges him to go on.
"Before I got married, I had it all," Paul explains, "Fast cars, cute girls and
plenty of money.
But a good friend warned me, 'Get married and start a family.
Other wise, no one will be there to give you a glass of water to drink when
you're on your deathbed........'So I took his advice.
I traded the girls for a wife, beer for baby food.
I sold my Ferrari and invested in college funds.
And now here we are........... And you know what?"
"What?"
"I'm not even thirsty!"

.

~~~ At every party, there are two kinds of people......those who want to go
home and those who don't.
The trouble is, usually they are married to each other.

.
~~~ Oscar Levant was playing a concert when a telephone began ringing
offstage.
The pianist carried on, but the ringing continued and the audience became
restless.
Levant, without pausing...glanced at the audience and said, "If that's for me,
tell them I'm busy."

.
~~~ Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut through
argument, debate and doubt, to offer a solution that everybody can
understand.- Colin Powell

.
~~~ couple of tourists were dining at a fine restaurant in Paris.
After waiting for an hour, the husband finally was able to catch the waiter's eye.
"I want a bottle of your best wine," he ordered.
"What year?" asked the waiter.
"Right now!" bellowed the tourist.

.
~~~ Annoyed at her husband's answer when people asked how long they'd
been married, his wife requested that he say "twenty-four years" instead of
announcing "almost a quarter of a century."

.
~~~ A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car;
but if he has a university education he may steal the whole railroad."

.
~~~ "Hello Mrs. Miller," said the bearded guy behind the counter at the
bagel shop.
My husband and I looked at him but drew complete blanks.
"I'm sorry, do we know each other?" I asked.
"Yeah, you was my English teacher."

.
~~~ "I've just had the most awful time", said the boy to his friends.
"First I got angina pectoris, then arteriosclerosis.
Just as I was recovering, I got psoriasis.
They gave my hypodermics, and, to top it all, tonsillitis was followed by
appendectomy".
"Wow!... How did you pull through ?", asked his friends.
"I don't know," the boy replied...continuing, "it was the toughest Spelling
Test I ever had!"

.
~~~ After many interruptions from her young son, a woman trying to choose
a greeting card tried to get a moment to finalize her selection.
She said, "I do not want to hear the word 'Mom' for five minutes."
Seconds later, the boy tugged her skirt and said, "Excuse me, miss."

.
~~~ I find I need to procrastinate many times before a chore completely
slips my mind.

.
~~~ Sue's father ran into the bedroom when he heard her scream and found
her two-year old brother pulling her hair.
He gently released the little boy's grip and said comfortingly to Sue,
"There, there.
He didn't mean it...... He doesn't know that hurts."
Dad was barely out of the room when the little boy screamed.
Rushing back in, he asked, "What happened?"
"He knows now," Sue replied.
.
.
Todays Thought; Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability.

Good Morning....Everyone... Well "Billy" missed us, all we got was a wee
bit of rain. I think Snowman got more...but don't know yet....
.

Surfers look out at the big waves at the Ventnor fishing pier in Atlantic City,
N.J., Saturday, Aug. 22, 2009 as Hurricane Bill churns in the Atlantic Ocean.
.

What a wild, fast ride.....

.

Reaching out to make contact: The humpback whale and Marco Queral look

like they're about take part in an underwater dance..

.

The Catalina has lain abandoned for over 40 years on the beach off the Strait of Tiran on the Saudi Arabia side of the entrance to the Gulf of Aqaba.
.

An example of the wire cage which East Poplar borough council in London proposed to fix to the outside of their tenement windows, so that babies could benefit from fresh air and sunshine ...

.

Cat Karate Chops Dog , saying "Get Back".........

.

Tucking her babys in for the night............

.

All three bringing the stick back......Cool.....

.

Party hardy........ Now that must have been "the party"....

.

♥♥♥

~~~ Two golden-agers were discussing their husbands over tea.
"I do wish that my Gus would stop biting his nails.
He makes me terribly nervous.""My Pete used to do the same thing," the older woman replied..... "But I broke him of the habit."
"How?"............"I hid his teeth."
.
~~~ A man was riding on a crowded bus, standing room only.
The bus stopped and an elderly lady got on carrying a large picnic basket.
She stood right in front of the man and grabbed the overhead rail so the picnic basket was above the man's head.
Being a gentleman, he offered his seat to her.
She quickly declined as she was only going a short distance.
Soon the picnic basket began to leak.
The man felt something drop on top of his head.
As he looked up it hit beside his nose and ran down across his lips.
He tasted it, looked up at the lady and asked, "Pickles?"
She replied, "No, no, puppies."

.
~~~ SIGNS YOU'RE IN A BAD HOSPITAL...
You recognize your doctor as kid who was mopping the lobby when you checked in.
Instead of sponge bath, they send St. Bernard to lick you.
In the operating room, you see a surgeon holding a sign that says, "WILL DO SURGERY FOR FOOD!"
Every couple of minutes, you hear a bugle playing Taps.
All the diplomas on the wall are signed by Sally Struthers.
You and your roommate have to take turns on the I.V.
Through fog of anesthesia, you hear surgeon shouting, "Bring the damn Scotch tape! And plenty of it!"
Instead of "patient," they use the term "plaintiff."

.
~~~ On her way to take a coffee break, a woman employed by a computer company saw a colleague sitting at his desk with his feet propped up, staring straight ahead and blinking. Concerned, she asked, "Are you all right?"
He answered, "I'm fine! I'm just in screen saver mode."

.
~~~ A honeymoon couple is in the Watergate Hotel in Washington.
The bride is concerned "What if the place is still bugged?"
The groom says "I'll look for a bug."
He looks behind the drapes, behind the pictures, under the rug "AHA!"
Under the rug was a disc with four screws.
He gets his Swiss army knife, unscrews the screws, throws them and the disc out the window. The next morning, the hotel manager asks the newlyweds ...."How was your room?", "How was the service?", "How was your stay at the Watergate Hotel?"
The groom says, "Why are you asking me all of these questions?"
The hotel manager says "Well, the room UNDER you complained of the chandelier falling on them."

.
~~~ "Women don't want to hear what you think.
Women want to hear what they think -- in a deeper voice.” --Bill Cosby

.
~~~ A heavy ground fog had settled across Louisiana's Delta Downs racetrack in December 1990 when jockey Sylvester Carmouche pulled off a surprise upset by finishing first on the 23-1 long shot Landing Officer.
But even more surprising was the magnitude of his victory.
Landing Officer won by 24 lengths, finishing just 1.2 seconds shy of the track record for a one-mile course.
It wasn't that Landing Officer had discovered an inner reserve of strength somewhere in the backstretch.
As it turned out, the jockey had steered the horse out of the race while lost from view in the fog, cut across the course and rejoined the field again as the other horses came around.
Other jockeys admitted they'd never even seen him. Carmouche received a 10-year ban but was reinstated after serving eight.

.
~~~ There are many ways to measure success, not the least of which is the way your child describes you when talking to friends.

.
~~~ When the skipper of an Icelandic trawler accidentally rammed Englishman Jim Hughes's yacht, he caused $30,000 worth of damage.
Exactly a year and a day before, reported the London Times, the skipper, Eriker Olafsson, had hit the same boat, causing $40,000 in damage.
What are the odds of this happening twice?
Pretty Good, since Olafsson purposely steered toward Hughes to apologize for the previous year's collision.

.
~~~ Doctor: Have you taken my advice and slept with the window open?
Patient: Yes, Doctor, I certainly have.
Doctor: So your asthma has disappeared completely?
Patient: No, but my watch, TV, iPod and laptop have.

.
~~~ Are you thinking you want kids?
Go to Chucky Cheese on Sunday.
You will leave there and buy a puppy....

.
~~~ The most saluted man in America is Richard Stans.
Legions of schoolchildren daily place their hands over their hearts to pledge allegiance to the flag and to the republic "For Richard Stans"
With all due patriotic fervor, the kids salute "one nation under guard".
.
.
Todays Thought; Humor is a hole that lets the sawdust out of a stuffed shirt.

And remember.... You'll wonder where the yellow went when you brush your teeth with Pepsodent....

Good Morning ...everyone.....hows your morning?
We're doing good after a day of boomers........
I guess "Billy" went by.....hope the friends up north
only get rain......
.

A magical place...... I go there to get recharged......
.

Nah.....they don't live there, just thought they were cute.......

reminds me of the squirrels we have here........

.

Small friends now----but later?..

.

Left you a present.......

.

Time for my zip-lock omlet.........

.

Yep....a redneck fix......works too.........

.

Yep they want breakfast too.......

.

I saw you throw that cat in the water......"YOU AN"T RIGHT"..

.

Someones gonna get wet, and he's going to be mad..........

.

♥♥♥

~~~ As part of a homework assignment, students were asked to define
"durable goods."
The class comedian came up with this: "appliances and automobiles that outlast
their time payments."

.
~~~ Barbara Bush was probably our most unflappable first lady.
When reporters spotted her in slippers and bathrobe walking her dog, Millie,
outside the family's Kennebunkport compound, she struck them dumb with a
terse, "Haven't you ever seen a woman walk a dog before?"

.
~~~ Carol; You Are A True Pet Lover If...You pick out your new linoleum for the
kitchen based on how well it will hold up to dogs toenails skidding after their toys.

.
~~~ Three men met at a party, and it wasn't long until the conversation got around
to their line of work and what kind of cars they drove.
"I'm a veterinarian," said the first fellow....... "So, naturally, I drive a white 'Vet."
As they smiled and nodded, the second man said, "I own a sign company, so I
drive a purple Neon.
"Now the third guy was suddenly quiet until he was egged on by the other two.
"Well," he finally said, "I'm a proctologist... and I have a brown Probe."
(Suzzie will like that one....)

.
~~~ Patient: I don’t get enough exercise.
Doctor: Try taking a long walk every night.
Patient: That’s the problem; I’m a lighthouse keeper.

.
~~~ During an election year a lot of politicians have a tendency to get free speech
confused with cheap talk.

.
~~~ I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age........
The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

.
~~~ It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true
that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.

.
~~~ Q: What is an elephant's length of gestation?
A: On average, it takes 660 days from conception for an elephant mother to
give birth.

.
~~~ My friend "Pete", walked into a bar and ordered six whiskies.
Lining them up on the bar, he downed the first glass, then the third and finally
the fifth.
"Excuse me," said the bartender as "Pete"turned to leave.
"But you've left three of the whiskies you ordered untouched."
"Yes," said "Pete".
"My doctor said it was OK to take the odd drink."

.
~~~ The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church
basement Friday at 7 PM.
The Congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

.
~~~ I'm trying to figure out what an emotionally unstable caveman has to do
with insurance.

.
~~~ Relatives gathered for the reading of the Last Will And Testament after a
long awaited death.
The lawyer opened the envelope, and read solemnly: "Being of sound mind
and body, I spent every last cent before I died."

.
~~~ SIGN IN A CAFETERIA:"Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria."
And hand written underneath: "Sandals can eat any place they want."

.
~~~ "Bobbie" sez: It's time to diet and exercise when you accept the fact that you
can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time,
but not while you're wearing a bathing suit.
.
.
Todays Thoughts; You should always carry change with you in case you need to
add your two cents' worth.

And : "If you can tell the difference between good advice and bad advice, you don't need advice."

And heed this: If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in
her way.

.

Good Morning....friends... Today is TGIF day, so get ready for the weekend...
.

Sunrise today..............
.

The Korean delicacy sannakji , is something quite different, as the seafood isn't quite dead.

baby octopus are sliced up and seasoned with sesame oil.

The tentacles are still squirming when this dish is served and, if not chewed carefully,

the tiny suction cups can stick to the mouth and throat......

This is not a dish for the fainthearted.

.

Cool lookin dude.........
.

I may not be prince charming but you can kiss me until you find him.

.

She's waiting for breakfast........were is it??

.

Singing for his breakfast.....And the guy might be it.......

.

Fastest animal on land is the cheetah — can run 70 miles per hour (113 km per hour)

.

Yea.....speeders get tickets..........

.

Oh, no......breakfast..........

.

♥♥♥

~~~ You know; What the world needs is more geniuses with humility,
there are so few of us left.

.

~~~ A patient had broken his leg and it was going to have to be set.
To get him ready for this painful event, he was heavily sedated.
While in this "state", he spoke rather freely with the hospital staff and with his wife.
She apparently learned several things about her husband.
When it was time to reverse the medication, the wife said, "Wait! not yet......
I have some more questions I want to ask".

.
~~~ The main speaker at a club luncheon was going on at great length about a very
dull subject.
Finally one man in the audience stepped outside where he met another man who
asked, "Has he finished his speech?"
"Long ago," came the weary reply, "But he won't stop talking."

.
~~~ Obama on his first visit to Yellowstone National Park said to his guide,
"Look at all those big rocks...... Wherever did they come from?"
"The glaciers brought them down," said the guide.
"But where are the glaciers?" Obama asked.
"The glaciers," said the guide in a weary voice, "have gone back for more rocks...

.
~~~ A little boy was being questioned by the teacher during an arithmetic lesson.
"If you had ten dollars," said the teacher, "and I asked you for the loan of five
dollars, how many dollars would you have left?"
"Ten," said young boy firmly.
"Ten?" the teacher said "How do you make it ten?"
"Well," replied the young student, "You can ask for a loan of five dollars,
but that doesn't mean you will get it."

.
~~~ "At the end of our first date the girl told me I was crazy in the head and
I should be committed to a mental institution.
Why do women always want us to make a commitment?"

.
~~~ At the end of a visit with our daughter, my husband insisted on leaving
her some of his pain medication for her migraine headaches.
A month later, he was talking with her on the phone and asked,
"Do those pills work?"
"I don't know," she replied.... "I haven't had a headache since you left."

.
~~~ A man walks into an insurance office and asks for a job.
"We don't need any one," they replied.
"You can't afford not to hire me.
I can sell anyone...anytime...any thing."
"We have two prospects that no one has been able to sell.
If you can sell just one, you have a job."
He was gone for about two hours and returned and handed them two checks,
one for a $80,000 policy and another for a $50,000 policy.
"How in the world did you do that," they asked."I told you I'm the world's best salesman, I can sell anyone...
anywhere...anytime."
"Did you get a urine sample?" they asked him.
"Why's that?" he asked."
Well, if you sell a policy over $40,000 the company requires a urine sample.
Take these two bottles and go back and get urine samples."He was gone for about eight hours and then he walks in with two five gallon
buckets, one in each hand.
He sets the buckets down and reaches in his shirt pocket and produces two
bottles of urine and sets them on the desk and says,.....
"Here's Mr. Cunningham's and this one is Mr. Stroman's.""That's good," they said, "but what's in those two buckets?"
"Well, I passed by the school house and they were having a state teachers
convention and I sold them a group policy!"

.
~~~ A man awoke from a dream while shouting greetings to an old friend.
Luckily the outburst did not seem to have bothered his wife.
However, as they prepared for bed that evening his wife remarked,
"If you happen to see someone you know tonight, would you just wave?"
.
.
Todays Thought: "Children are the living messages we send to a time we
will not see."

Good Morning....I bet every ones getting tired of seeing good morning every morning.
So how about Hey guys? or Whatsup?
.

They wonder whats going on......
.

I guess they find it very funny..........

.

Nice old panel truck........

.

Time for breakfast..............................

.

He heard a noise, so he's checking it out........

.

Oh, no.....we got a bad egg...........

.

He better be pumping that bike..........

.

Turn the air down.........

.

Got the air working.........

.

♥♥♥

~~~ Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury.
David's Triumph was heard throughout the land.
Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.

.
~~~ A really proud fisherman is setting in the pub with his mates, telling them of an epic battle he had with a huge monster fish.
His buddy starts laughing and says "I've seen the pictures, and that fish

was 6 inches at the most!"
"yea, so?" the proud fisherman replied ......
"after 4 hours of fighting, a fish can loose a lot of weight!"

.
~~~ How can I be overdrawn, I still have checks!

.
~~~ Son on his laptop said to his Mother: "I got an 'A' in my business class.
I outsourced my homework to a kid overseas!"

.
~~~ Brenda said.... My husband was describing our upcoming holiday at a resort to our four children, aged three to nine.
It was at a place where the beds would be made, he told them, the meals would be cooked, and all the cleaning would be done for us.
Our oldest looked puzzled...... "Then what's Mommy coming for?" he asked.

.
~~~ It's a good thing the guy in charge of naming galaxies was into chocolate

bars and not Chinese food.
Otherwise, the Milky Way might have been named Moo Goo Gui Pan, and

who wants to have to learn about that?

.
~~~ A guy was hiking in the woods one day when a bear chases him up

a really tall tree.
The bear started to climb the tree, so the guy climbed up higher.
Then, the bear climbed down and went away.
So the guy starts to climb down the tree.
Suddenly, the bear returns, and this time he's brought an even bigger

bear with him.
The two bears climb up the tree, the bigger bear going higher than the first.
But the guy climbed even higher still, so the bears couldn't reach him.
Eventually, the bears went away.
Naturally quite relieved, the guy starts down the tree again.
Suddenly, the two bears return.
But this time the guy knew he was in big trouble.....
Each bear was carrying a beaver.

.
~~~ My husband and I have been raising poultry for several years.
One evening while we were at the hatchery to get a batch of chicks, a neighbor

phoned, wanting to speak to my husband.
He was left speechless when my daughter, five-year-old Brittany, told him

that her dad couldn't come to the phone because he was in town picking up chicks.

.
~~~ While enjoying our sport-fishing boat, I tried to teach my wife how to

operate it, in case of emergency.
She always preferred to soak up the sun, rather than my instructions.
Heading home under full power at the end of one outing, I stepped away

from the controls and told her:
"Pretend I'm having a heart attack.
You must take the controls, bring the boat back to shore and secure it."
She did this successfully, as I sat nearby answering her questions.
That evening while I was relaxing on the couch, my wife came in from the

kitchen, where she had been cooking dinner.
Sitting down next to me, she said, "Pretend I'm having a heart attack.
You must finish cooking dinner, clean up and wash the dishes."

.
~~~ You Know You’re In Alaska When...You have to put your sun visor

down at 3:00 a.m.

.
~~~ Our six-year-old son begged us for a pet, and we told him he could

have a goldfish.
We saw that the pet shop was having a sale on goldfish kits, which included

the fish, fishbowl, food and coloured stones for the bowl's bottom.
When I said that we would be buying him a goldfish kit, he looked surprised,

"You mean," he said, "I have to put together my own fish?!"

.
~~~ Most of American life is driving somewhere and then driving back

wondering why the hell you went.

.
~~~ Worried patient: "Doctor, I'm very worried.
I'm still suffering from exhaustion and fatigue when I come home from

work every evening."
Doctor: "Oh, that's nothing to worry about.
Just have a few drinks before your dinner...that will soon wake you up.
"Patient: "Thanks very much, doctor.
But when I consulted you before, you told me to cut out drinking alcohol

completely.
"Doctor: "Yes, so I did......
But that was last week and medical science has progressed enormously

since then."
.
.
Todays Thought: Admitting failure like drinking bitter tea. (Charlie Chan )