Monday, July 27, 2015

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Couple One liners....... 
1) I make Bear fajitas, they're called "Sizzly bears"? 

2) Ancient Vikings had a secret method of 
communication. It was called Norse Code ....

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You know what's interesting? 
Practically no one in this country wants to admit they 
watch porn, yet it's a multi-billion dollar industry. 

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daddy can I tell you a secret?
Me: sure thing buddy
*grabs my face and whispers* I just pooped and I didn't 
wash my hands... 

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Five black men in purple dinner jackets & bow ties were 
found floating today under a pier in New Orleans. 
DNA tests later identified them as The Drifters. 
Rumor has it they were under the boardwalk, 
down by the sea.  

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It must suck when billionaires wake up feeling like a 
million bucks..

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Gus looking for love sent his picture to the Lonely Hearts Club.
The reply came back, “We are not that lonely.”

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A Japanese man was caught in a revolving door.
He soon became disoriented. 

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Teacher - "Peter, I am going to have to ban you from 
class permanently."
Peter - "why miss ?"
Teacher - "you disrupt the class, swear all day and 
worst of all you keep putting your hand up the girls 
skirts .
From now on you can drop your kid at school and pick 
him up at the normal time like the rest of the parents."

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Nothing embarrasses a psychic more than throwing them 
a surprise party.

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It bothers me when I see tax money wasted on signs 
telling deer where to cross the road. 

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