Tuesday, February 24, 2015



After eight days of backpacking with my wife,we were looking 
pretty scruffy. 
One morning she came to breakfast in a baseball cap, 
her shoulder length hair sticking out at odd angles.
"Darling," she said, "does my hair make me look like a water 
I thought for a moment, then said, "If I tell you the truth, do 
you promise not to charge?"

Q: What do you call 10 blondes in a freezer? 
A: Frosted Flakes! 

This youth group broke the number one cardinal rule of 
making money at a Car Wash. 
They let the fat chick hold the car wash sign. 

A man called and asked the chemist, 
"My doctor ordered this prescription of ninety cholesterol pills 
for me.
 I got it filled at your chemist shop. 
As I was reaching towards the end of bottle a packet dropped 
It instructed 'Do Not Eat'. 
Well that was three days ago, can you tell me when should I 
start eating now again. because I'm starving."

A Los Angeles man who later said he was "tired of 
walking," stole a steamroller and led police on a 
5 mph chase until an officer stepped aboard and 
brought the vehicle to a stop.

Did you ever hear about the Lucky Charms leprechaun's 
evil twin?
He was tragically malicious. 

62 people were stricken with salmonella poisoning 
after drinking unpasteurized orange juice at Disney 
Disney officials admit the mistake, but downplay 
the sickness, pointing out that 
"it's a small hurl after all."

"That's disgusting!" shouts the girl. 
"It's the dog," proclaims the guy. 
"Don't blame him," she replies, "he was cooked 

"Oh love, what did you ever do to deserve a wife 
like me?"
she said looking lovingly into her husbands eyes.
"I don't know, but I promise I'll never do it again."