••
♥
"Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter
quite like unrequited love."
-- Charles M. Schulz
••
Q: What did the snail say when it caught a ride
on the back of the turtle as it was crossing the
road?
A: "Yahoo!"
••
There was a student who was desirous of taking
admission for a study course.
He was smart enough to get through the written
test, a GD and was to appear for the personal
interview.
Later, as the interview progressed, the
interviewer found this boy to be bright since he
could answer all the questions correctly.
The interviewer got impatient and decided to
corner the boy.
"Tell me your choice;" said he to the boy,
"What's your choice: I shall either ask you ten
easy questions or ONE real difficult.
Think well before you make up your mind."
The boy thought for a while and said,
"My choice is ONE real difficult question."
"Well, good luck to you, you have made your
own choice!" said the man on the opposite side.
Tell me: What comes first, Day or Night?"
The boy was jolted first but he waited for a while
and said: "It's the DAY, sir."
"How???????" the interviewer was smiling
("At last, I got you!" he said to himself.)
"Sorry sir, you promised me that you will not ask
me a SECOND difficult question!"
Admission for the course was thus secured.
••
A college pizza delivery boy arrived at the house
of Mr.Smith.
He delivered the pizza .
After giving it to him, Mr. Smith asked:
"What is the usual tip?"
"Well," replied the youth, "this is my first trip here,
but the other guys say if I get a quarter out of you,
I'll be doing great."
"Is that so?" snorted Mr. Smith.
"Well, just to show them how wrong they are,
here's five dollars."
"Thanks," replied the youth, "I'll put this in my
school fund."
"What are you studying in school?" asked Larry.
The lad smiled and said: "Applied psychology."
••
"Settle down, kids. You can play Whac-a-Mole
when the man with the neck tattoo uses up his
tokens."
Chuck E Cheese is such a special place.
••
When I lose an argument in life I stay positive
and remind myself that I am going to win this
argument in the shower 6 hours from now....
••
Why does it always have to be "he's addicted to
drugs"?
Why can't it ever be, "he's passionate about drugs"?
••
It's strange, isn't it.
You stand in the middle of a library and go
'Aaaaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you.
But you do the same thing on an airplane, and
everyone joins in.
••
Sure I could get off the couch & put new
batteries in this remote, but instead I am going to
hold it high above my head & at different angles.
••
It's ironic how the colors red, white and blue
represent freedom...until they're flashing behind
you.
••••
