Saturday, April 30, 2011

Good Morning.....Friends and neighbors..Ready for the weekend?
In the 60's all week....rain a couple days.....
If you can believe the weather man.....
Yesterday was mrs. Martins Birthday....

 Yesterdays sun rise....Started off pretty cloudy....

About noon the clouds broke up...
But the wind came up and it clouded up again around 4:00...

Feeding the Baby??
Oh, You cool "Bubba"

They's watchin ya....

Is it safe to come out??
I'm hungry!!

"123 Blast off"......

Signing in the rain, just singing in the rain...

Cows can jump too....

Sometime this is how I feel.....

There has been a terrible wipe out down the road....
I know, I's bad.......
Pete made me do it......

Training a duck??
I gotta leave on this pic.....


~~  Enclosed with the pills my friend received from a
veterinarian was a sheet of red heart stickers to place on
a calendar as a reminder to give her pet the medication.
She attached these stickers to her kitchen calendar,
marking the first Saturday of every month. 
When her husband noticed the hearts, he grinned from
ear to ear, turned to his wife and asked,
"Do you have something special in mind for these days?"

~~  My friend's husband is always telling her that
housekeeping would be a snap if only she would organize
her time better. 
Recently he had a chance to put his theory into practice
while his wife was away.
When I popped in one evening to see how he was
 managing, he crowed.
"I made a cake, frosted it, washed the kitchen windows,
cleaned all the cupboards, scrubbed the kitchen floor,
walls and ceiling and even had a bath."
I was about to concede that perhaps he was a better
manager than his wife, when he added sheepishly.
"When I was making the chocolate frosting. 
I forgot to turn off the mixer before taking the beaters
out of the bowl, so I had to do all the rest."

~~  Needing to shed some weight, my husband and I
went on a diet that had specific recipes for each meal of
the day. 
I followed the instructions closely, dividing the finished
recipe in half for our individual plates. 
We felt terrific and thought the diet was wonderful we
never felt hungry!
But when we realized we were gaining weight, not losing it. 
I checked the recipes again. 
There, in fine print, was "Serves 6."

~~  One evening after dinner my five-year-old son Roy
noticed that his mother had gone out. 
In answer to his questions, I told him, "Mommy is at a
Tupperware party." 
This explanation satisfied him for only a moment. 
Puzzled, he asked, "What's a Tupperware party, Dad?"
I've always given my son honest answers, so I figured a
simple explanation would be the best approach. 
"Well Brian," I said, "at a Tupperware party, a bunch of
ladies sit around and sell plastic bowls to each other."
Brian nodded, indicating that he understood. 
The he burst into laughter. "Come on, Dad," he said
"What is it really?"

~~  about some medical tests I was to have the next
morning, I repeatedly told my fears to my friend, Bobbie.
"Don't worry," Bobbie finally said.
"They' ll give you a sedative through an IV in your arm."
"That's what they do to dogs when they want to kill them!" I exclaimed.
"Then don't bark!" Bobbie snapped.

~~ It was so cold during our trip to Canada that my wife
and I ducked into a department store to buy long
When we asked a saleswoman where we could find a pair,
 she directed us to the lingerie department.
"You know you're in Canada," I grumbled to my wife,
"when long johns are considered lingerie.

~~  Friends and I were chatting over dinner in a restaurant. 
A man at the next table told his cellphone caller to hold on. 
Then he stepped outside to talk.
When he returned, I said "That was very thoughtful."
"I had no choice." he said to me.
"You were making too much noise."

~~  Following expert advice, a family went on vacation
taking half as many clothes and twice as much money
as they thought they would need. 
What with buying T-shirts at every tourist attraction,
they came back home with twice as many clothes and
none of the money.

~~  When the legendary salesman was asked his secrets
for success, he replied, "You know the cardinal rules:
know your products, make lots of calls, and never take no
for an answer.
But frankly, I owe my success to consistently missing a
three-foot putt by two inches."

~~  It looks like another cold, dreary, rainy,  weekend
Oh,Well, I am behind on my barstool warming,
and this would be a perfect opportunity for me to get
caught up.

~~  The rich keep all the money, pay none of the taxes.
The middle class pay all the taxes, do all of the work.
The poor are just there to scare the heck out of the middle

Todays thought:  A budget is a way of spending money without getting
any fun out of it.

Rae's Trivia......For every extra kilogram carried on a space flight,
530 kg of excess fuel are needed at lift-off......
A bonus.. trivia.... 
The Swine Flu vaccine in 1976 caused more death and
illness than the disease it was intended to prevent....


Friday, April 29, 2011

# 1,268

Good morning, Friends...
Started out cloudy, and rainy...but cleared up,
and turned out very good. kinda windy though....
We're gonna have a geat weekend... no rain..

 Yesterdays sunrise....

Ready to eat this morning??

I don't think that's gonna do it.....

Gotta take "Petoona" for a drive......

Mean lookin bunch.....

On a diet....are ya??

Then why don't you do the blog??
Then maybe I can go back to bed.....

I don't know... I think someones been playing around..

Now thats cool...
Dumb, but cool.....

I see someones fixed his gear shift.....

Yeah...I cought the teenage cats, sneakin a smoke..

Well, time to go.... My rides here.....


~~  My wife's an earth sign.
I'm a water sign.
Together we make mud.

~~  I did something last night I haven't done in years;
I got really hammered.
Knowing I was wasted, I did something else I've never
done before: I took the bus home.
I arrived safe and sound, which is surprising,
since I've never driven one before!

~~  I visited a bomb making factory today but the people
there got very angry when I called it that.
They said they preferred the word 'mosque.'

~~  There was a papa mole, a mamma mole, and a baby
They lived in a hole out in the country near a farmhouse.
Papa mole poked his head out of the hole and said,
"Mmmm, I smell sausage!"
Mamma mole poked her head outside the hole and said,
"Mmmm, I smell pancakes!"
Baby mole tried to stick his head outside but couldn't
because of the two bigger moles.
Baby mole said, "The only thing I smell is molasses."

~~  At a commuter train station a policeman noticed a
woman driver bowed over the steering wheel of her car.
"Is there anything wrong?" said the policeman.
Half crying and half laughing the woman responded,
"For ten years I have driven my husband to the station
to catch his train..... This morning I forgot him!"

~~  A woman in Brazil is considering suing a zoo after a
monkey threw a rock at her and hit her in the head.
She wants to sue the zoo.
I think she is pretty serious too.
In fact, she went right into the reptile house and hired
a lawyer.

~~  The police came to my front door the other night
holding a picture of my wife.
The Constable said “Is this your wife sir?”
Shocked I answered “Yes”
They said “We’re afraid it looks like she’s been hit by a bus”.
I said “I know, but she has a lovely personality & she’s
good with the kids”.

~~  A man falls down a flight of stairs and Pete
rushes over to him and asks, "Did you miss a step?"
"No," he answers, "I hit every one of them!"

 ~~  One of my friends, a musician, is always upbeat.
Nothing gets her down.
 But when she developed ringing in one ear,
I was concerned it might overwhelm even her.
When I asked if her condition was especially annoying to
a musician, she shook her head.
"Not really," she said cheerfully.
"The ringing sound is in the key of B flat, so I use it to
tune my cello a half-tone lower."

~~  A sign on Washington's Route 8, featuring an
illustration of a police car with lights flashing, reads ;
"If you drink and drive, we'll provide the chasers."

~~  A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his
The bartender says, "What's with the paper towel?"
The pirate says, "Arrr! I've got a Bounty on me head!"

Todays Thought: He who believes in freedom of the will has never loved
and never hated.

Rae's Trivia... After mating, the male Surinam Toad affixes the female's
eggs to her back, where her spongy flesh will swell and
envelope them.
When the froglets hatch, they leave behind holes in their
mother's flesh that they will remain sheltered in until
large enough to fend for themselves.

and a bonus for friday.......
Astronauts can't belch - there is no gravity to separate
iquid from gas in their stomachs.

ºº><(((º> <º)))><ºº

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Good Morning, Friends and neighbors...
We had 3 thunder storms move through
yesterday evening.... But thankfully no damage....

Nice Sunrise.......

This is the best I could get so far...
Their are only males so far
and they are flighty.....

no your not.....
your just a puddy kat!

Oh, No...why??
Bubba,...the bag won't protect you....

You seem to get them in the middle of the night!!

Fish sticks??  Pete?
Called a moon fish....

Okay, Okay....
I take it you don't like fish sticks?


Gotta wash them windows...

They sure don't look like their supposed to....
were is all the chocolate bits??

Bubba's going to need some treatment....
No supposed to do that....


~~  How do you expect kids to listen to their parents...
Tarzan lives half naked, Cinderella comes back home at
midnight, Pinocchio lies all the time,
 Aladdin is the king of thieves, Batman drives at 320 Mph,
Sleeping beauty is lazy, and Snow white lives with 7 guys.
 We shouldn’t be surprised when kids misbehave!
They get it from their story books.

~~  You know; "If Darwin´s theory of Evolution was
correct, cats would be able to operate a can-opener by

~~  A lot of trouble in this world is caused by combining
a narrow mind with a wide mouth.

~~  A waiter brings the customer the steak that he
ordered, with his thumb over the meat.
"Are you crazy?" yelled the customer, "Your hand is on
my steak!"
"What?" answers the waiter, "You want it to fall on the
floor again?"

~~  My daughter was doing a project on 70's rock groups,
and she asked me to name two of them.
"Yes!" I said.
"Who?" she asked.
"There you go," I replied.

~~  The national budget must be balanced.
The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the
authorities must be moderated and controlled.
Payments to foreign governments must be reduced,
if the nation doesn't want to go bankrupt.
People must again learn to work, instead of living on
public assistance.
(Marcus Tullius Cicero (106 BC-43 BC)...Roman orator,
philosopher, lawyer and politician)

~~  I was taking my weekly trip to the ice cream store.
When I arrived cops surrounded the store & they had the
store entrance sealed up.
I asked a cop who was standing near by what happened,
he replied "we were called by a member of the public
who entered the store to find the owner lying face down
on the floor and he was covered from head to toe in syrup,
nut sprinkles and chocolate sprinkles."
I asked what they thought happened and the cop replied,
"He topped himself."

~~  In a greasy spoon, a downhearted diner asked the
waitress for goulash and some kind words.
She brought the goulash but didn’t say a thing.
“Hey,” he said, “what about my kind words?” She replied,
 “Don’t eat the goulash.”

~~  While reading the newspaper, I came across an
article about a beautiful actress and model who married
a boxer who was not noted for his IQ.
"I'll never understand," I commented to my wife,
"why the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives."
My wife replied, "Why, thank you, dear."

~~  One rule to follow carefully on your way to success
is to stay on your own toes and off those of others.

~~  Our cat, Figaro, comes home between 10 or 11 at
night to eat.
If he's late, I turn on the carport light and call him until
he appears.
One day my daughter was explaining to a friend where we
live, and her friend said, "Is that anywhere near the house
where the woman stands on her steps late at night and
sings opera?"

~~  The sound of a kiss isn't as loud as that of a cannon,
but its echo takes a lot longer to disappear.

Todays Thought: Slander is like a hornet -- if you cannot kill it with the
first blow, better not slap at it.

Rae's trivia....A camel can lose up to 30 percent of its body weight in
perspiration and continue to cross the desert.
A human would die of heat shock after sweating away
only 12 percent of his body weight.


Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Good morning....And how is everybody doing this morning.?
Going to be another good day... The weather has been
rough for the middle of the country....
"Wake up Pete" The Sun's out and the serf's up....

Fancy hardboiled eggs this morning??

So that's were my damn ham went.....
Now I gotta just have them eggs....
Just remembered Pete cooked a ham...

Hey, that hungery...
You better wait....I know were their is a fat frog..

Now look what you done....
I told you to stop eating all that Ham.....!

No! It's for cats, too.......

Awwww, you had to just let it go......
Not hardboiled

Yes they will...
They will laugh at all of us...

Yep....thats true.....

Fly the friendly Sky......

I don't know about Eno.......
Just an't right.....

Well, time to head out.....
gotta get these tires home...

~~  Indigestion
The failure to adjust a square meal to a round stomach.

~~  Little Johnny had just learned to count on his fingers.
One day his uncle came to visit and Little Johnny was
anxious to show off his newly-acquired skill.
He asked his uncle to give him an addition question.
His uncle asked, "What is three plus four?"
Little Johnny counted it out on his fingers and said,
His uncle said, "Listen, Little Johnny, you can't count it
out on your hands because someday when you are in
school, a teacher will get mad at you for it.
Now put your hands in your pockets."
Little Johnny put his hands in his pockets and his uncle
asked, "What is five plus five?"
His uncle saw movement in Little Johnny's pockets,
and then Little Johnny said, "Eleven!"

~~  A foursome of guys is waiting at the men's tee while
a foursome of women is hitting from the ladies' tee.
The ladies are taking their time.
When the final lady is ready to hit her ball, she hacks it
10 feet.
Then she goes over and whiffs it completely.
Then she hacks it another ten feet and finally hacks it
another five feet.
She looks up at the patiently waiting men and says
apologetically, "I guess all those damn dance lessons I took
over the winter didn't help."
One of the men immediately responds:
"Well, there you have it.
You should have taken golf lessons instead!"
He never even had a chance to duck.
He was 68.......

~~  It was a joyous crisp November afternoon when
Scott brought his wife Karen and their newborn baby
Jordan home from the hospital.
"I want to hold my brother," four-year-old Logan begged
as Karen came in the house carrying the newborn.
"First we have to change his diaper," she said.
As Karen removed the diaper, Logan noticed the baby's
belly button and asked, "When does his umbrella cord
come off?"

~~  Q. What did the bartender ask Charles Dickens when
he ordered a martini?
A. Olive or twist?

~~  *Resurrection Update*
A singing group call "The Resurrection" was scheduled
to sing at a church.
Everyone was excited about the concert and looked
forward to the event.
We were disappointed when a big snowstorm
postponed the group's performance.
To let everyone know about the cancellation,
the pastor changed the sign outside to read,
"The Resurrection is postponed."

~~  A number of years ago I had applied for financial
assistance through a home-repair program.
The receptionist phoned to inform me that my
application had been reviewed and I could go ahead
with my plans.
She then added, "In order to receive assistance, you
will have to sign papers that you will live in this home
for at least five years."
"I can't agree to that," I said.
"I could be dead in five years."
"Oh, that would be fine," she replied.

~~  ~~ Newspaper ads can be expensive.
As a result, many companies abbreviate words.
However this company cut just one corner too many:
"Wanted: Office Ass."

~~  Middle age is that time when a voice in one ear says --
                                     Why not? and a voice in the other ear says -- Why bother?

~~  In the final analysis, more people depend on solar
energy for snow removal than any other method.
Todays Thought; "One of the greatest delusions in the world is the hope
 that the evils in this world are to be cured by legislation."

Rae's Trivia....It is difficult to drown an ant because water doesn’t
penetrate their minuscule breathing tube;
the ants will suffer, however, from too much carbon dioxide,
which knocks them out.
It takes awhile, but they will eventually die.


Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Good Morning....Friends and neighbors....
Nice warm days feel good....
I guess we're lucky.....

Liver loaf....Omg...that does not sound good..
I don't think I would want that
for Breakfast....

What!!.... Liver Loaf??

I know what your saying......

I know...I know...Cats love Liver....
Me....not so much...

Whats this??.. Captain Liver, to save the day??
Gee...I don't know what to say??

Yes, and funny looking too.... Bubba!!

Are you just finding that out??
I don't know about Funny....
Strange, maybe.....

Hey....he doesn't want that liver loaf for breakfast!!

As much as I toss and would throw me
outta the bed.....

And don't forget it, or it's "Liver Loaf" for breakfast.

Well, time to leave intil tomorrow morning...

~~  An alarm clock is a small mechanical device to wake
people who have no children.

~~  - Sign on the Nurses'Lounge -
Effective immediately, your fifteen-minute breaks are
being cut from a half hour to twenty minutes.

~~  My husband was presenting to teachers on his staff
an after- school workshop on "Hazardous Materials in
the Workplace" and asked me if I'd drop off some baked
goods to be served with coffee.
As I arranged the plates on the table, I was dismayed to
see the sign he had placed beside them,
until I noticed the spelling.
It read "Hazardous Waist Material.....
 Please help yourself."

 ~~  I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I
see a snake, which I also keep handy. (W.C. Fields)

~~  During a Papal audience, a business man
approached the Pope and made this offer:
Change the last line of the Lord's prayer from
"give us this day our daily bread" to
"give us this day our daily chicken."
and KFC will donate 10 million dollars to Catholic
The Pope declined.
2 weeks later the man approached the Pope again.
This time with a 50 million dollar offer.
Again the Pope declined.
A month later the man offers 100 million, this time the
Pope accepts.
At a meeting of the Cardinals, The Pope announces his
decision in the good news/bad news format.
The good news is... that we have 100 million dollars for
The bad news is that we lost the Wonder Bread account!

~~  All I know about money matters is that money matters.

~~  I went to lunch with a friend yesterday to a new
chicken place.
We asked how they prepare their chickens.
The answer was, "We just tell them they're going to die."

~~  I never would have married you if I knew how stupid
you were!"
shouted the woman to her husband!
The husband replied, "You should've known how stupid
I was the minute I asked you to marry me!"

~~  Indistinct: Downwind from a skunk.

~~  There was a nervous patient whose imagination
afflicted him with all kinds of ills which never seemed to
One afternoon he staggered into the house.
He was bent forward, and tottering to a chair, still curled
 into a half-moon shape.
"Honey," he gasped, "it's come at last.
There was no warning.
All of a sudden I can't straighten up, and I can't lift my
She immediately called the doctor.
When the doctor arrived and looked over the patient,
 the wife inquired, "Is there any hope?"
"Well," the doctor said, "it will help a good deal if he
can unhitch the third buttonhole of his vest from the top
button of his trousers."

Todays Thought:  “The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life.
Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat.”
-  Albert Einstein

Rae's trivia... In the midst of World War II, the U.S. Navy’s world
champion chess player, Reuben Fine, calculated,
on the basis of positional probability, where enemy
submarines might surface.
Although Fine was merely a pawn, he helped
"checkmate" the enemy.