Gonna get colder and wetter.....
This mornings sunrise......weather moving in..
Carol's latest oil painting.... She's got talent....
I need my toe nails done....you think they would do that?
I get tired of wearing open toed shoes......
Books for tall people??
Party time?? Happy New Year??
Are you crazy??
Good Place to nap.....makes the birds mad though....
Thats right....Boneless Chicken Dinner....
Let me out.....I don't wanna ride....
Well, the police are after me, so I gotta go....
~~ QUESTION: Why do Eskimos wash their clothes in tide?
ANSWER: Because it's too cold out tide!
~~ QUESTION: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his
ANSWER: He wanted to win the No-bell prize.
~~ On a nighttime visit to his brother's base, my son Joe was
impressed by the large airplane hangar in which Billy worked.
But when Billy led him through another door, Joe was absolutely
astounded by the massive, darkened room.
"This is the largest building I've ever been in!" he said.
"What do you call it?"
His brother answered, "The outside."
~~ My grandfather was sipping a beer when he confessed to me
he'd drunk more than usual the day before.
"What's more than usual?" I asked.
"You can drink a case in a day?!"
"Well," he grumbled defensively, "it doesn't take all day."
~~ A man is driving with his wife at his side and his mother-in-law
in the backseat.
The women don't leave him alone.
His mother-in- law says, "You're driving too fast!"
His wife says, "Stay more to the left."
After ten mixed orders, the man turns to his wife and asks,
"Who's driving this car, you or your mother?"
~~ One Mother's Day at church, I noticed carts of little potted
flowers beside the altar.
The pastor asked all the children to come forward and pick out
a plant for their mother.
My children and I had certainly survived some very hard times,
and this special bit of appreciation was just what I needed.
I was surprised when my children presented me with a small,
bedraggled flower plant.
Yet I saw joy and pride in their eyes, and asked them,
out of all those beautiful flowers, what had made them pick
this plant for me?
My son said, "This one looked like it needed you, Mom."
~~ Two men lost their long-time drinking buddy to alcoholism.
At the funeral, as they passed by the open casket,
one remarked to the other,
"Gee, Sam sure looks good, doesn't he?"
The other replied, "Well, he ought to;
he hasn't had a drink in 3 days."
~~ The Vacation Bible School theme for the day was
"God's All-Star Champions," so they had sports-related activities.
To get in the sports spirit, and since Denver has several
professional sports teams, the minister asked,
"What is the name of the place where the
Colorado Avalanche play hockey?"
One of the children answered, "Pepsi Center."
"And where do the Denver Broncos play?"
"Invesco Field at Mile High."
"And where do the Colorado Rockies play?"
"And finally, where do the Nuggets play?"
~~ Danielle's six-year-old daughter Brooke attended a birthday
party for her friend Emily and nearly died from embarrassment.
As the birthday girl opened Brooke's gift, which was a Barbie doll,
Emily exclaimed, "Thanks. I've always wanted this."
"That's good," said Brooke, "Because I didn't,
so my mom wrapped it up for you."
~~ Laura was away from home on Thanksgiving Day for the
first time and she was missing her home and family desperately.
Laura decided to cook a turkey herself, just like her Mom used to,
so that she could feel closer to her family.
Laura returned home for the celebrations and recounted her
experience to her Mom saying,
"Mom. it was so difficult to eat the turkey."
"Why was that, dear" asked Mom in a concerned way,
"was it not cooked properly?"
"How would I know?" responded Laura, "it wouldn't sit still."
Todays Thought: There are two rules for success:
1) Don't tell all you know.