Gotta do my morning exercises......
Sunrise in the country....
I was sitting on the couch one night reading about Einstein's theories.
Baffled, I turned to my wife next to me and commented, "Man, relativity is hard."
Without missing a beat she replied, "Compared to what?"
"Like heck it gets easier!
kids just get bigger, moodier, dirtier, louder and then, suddenly, like after a tornado, they're gone and it's way too quiet."
"It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.'" (Sam Levenson...1911-1980)
The bride came down the aisle and when she reached the altar, the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side.
She said:" What are your golf clubs doing here"?
He looked her right in the eye and said, "This isn't going to take all day, is it?"
"There is nothing more horrifying than stupidity in action." - Adlai E. Stevenson